The Steakhouse - Agua Caliente Casino Palm Springs
Plans for the future?
SimCasino is in early access. I was curious if the devs have any kind of a road map for features they plan to add in to the game. But in the meantime, here are some ideas I'd love to see implemented one way or another...
Poker Room. This should be a zone-able room. I could potentially make the same case for blackjack and other table games, for the sake of being able to set the same rules for a whole room full of similar games without setting the rules for the entire casino, but I think poker especially should have a room. A poker room would allow a poker desk where the poker room manager handles making/breaking tables. Instead of the player deciding how many tables are Hold'em or Omaha or whatever other game, the player can select what games are allowed at the poker desk and let the poker floor manager run the making & breaking of games (this is how it works in real life). Additionally, a poker room would allow the tables in a specific area to be connected to each other in order to allow for poker tournaments. Poker tournaments are generally less profitable for casinos than normal cash games, but they can help the poker room fill up empty tables at otherwise less busy times.
Spas, shopping malls, restaurants, golfing, sports arena (boxing, mma, etc), convention center. Lots of casinos, especially in Las Vegas, aren't casinos so much full featured resorts that happen to also have a casino attached.
Megaprizes. Think National Lampoons Vegas Vacation where Russ ("Papa Giorgio") keeps winning the cars. It'd be great to be able to pop in a car attached to a slot machine that serves as both a gambling interaction point for guests, but also decor and entertainment. It'd basically be a jackpot-only slot machine. It could be a car. It could be a giant oversized slot machine with a huge jackpot.
Standalone restaurants. Unless I'm missing something, the only dining option currently is a buffet. It's probably the best option if you only have the one option, but one of my favorite parts about visiting Las Vegas is actually the food. All of the casinos are full of restaurants under the name of celebrity chefs. Looking at just Caesar's Palace in Las Vegas, there are 2 Gordon Ramsay restaurants, 1 Bobby Flay, 1 Guy Savoy, and a few others by less famous yet still celebrity chefs. And that's just Caesar's Palace alone.
VIPs. Whether famous professional poker players or just general celebrities, it'd be neat to have the opportunity to attract them as a visitor which in turn could drive more normal guests to your casino. To a degree, this could even have your casino develop a reputation (think modern Rat Pack?).
Events. Ocean's 11 style heists. Super Bowl weekend overflowing your SportsBook. Major poker tournaments (special higher limits versions of the poker tournaments mentioned above, think like WSOP, WPT, etc). Major conventions in town spiking demand for business guests. Downturn in economy just overall reducing demand across the board. These would all be events outside of the player's control. But there should also be promotional events the player's can run to encourage certain kinds of behaviors. This would include aforementioned poker tournaments.. but weirdly, casinos also have slot machine tournaments. Casinos also can do things like give away "free" chips when you check in to a hotel room or for signing up with the player's club (I say free because usually they're special chips that can't actually be cashed out, but can be used at the table games [other than poker] as if they were real).
A more fully fledged tech tree. I'd kind of like to immediately build blackjack tables without any research. But also other table games would have to be researched. Also, additional rules for blackjack (that ultimately improve the profitability of the table) should be researched. Meanwhile, with slot machines, we should start with slot machines that aren't even in the game yet (the ones with the 3 spinners, 3 lines and you need to make a line or diagonal, with cherry, bar, etc.). These get researched into 5 spinners, 5 lines and then you can go to the computer poker machines (which are in the game) and more modern fully digital slot machines and stuff. With slot machines, after the ones with the physical spinners, the research would be more along the lines of unlocking the different themes for them.
Roaming staff. I don't know, maybe I'm not there in the game yet... but generally in a casino, you have servers walking around trying to bring alcohol to patrons (and in the poker rooms and sports books, this can even include full food deliveries from the restaurants). In Las Vegas, this is free in every casino I've ever been in. Outside of Vegas, you typically still have to pay for the alcohol, but nonetheless someone is bringing it to you... because the casino wants you sat in front of that slot machine continuing to feed it.
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Recommendations for a resort / experience for my fobby, frugal Asian parents for Christmas
I live in San Francisco but my parents live in LA. I'm looking for a resort or experience to give my parents anytime between the December 22 - January 2. Ideally it would be 1-3 days. I took my parents to Florida once and they were more entertained by the Hard Rock Casino than me taking them to the Everglades or South Beach. They're not into touristy places or money traps like Disneyland although they really do enjoy light gambling and eating. They're the type to be mostly just on their iPads updating their Facebooks (especially my mom), exploit seafood buffets, and pose infront of anything that looks like a statue. I don't know if they would enjoy the zoo or an aquarium. They're into outlets but not really into huge malls unless there is something to pose next to. It's just I would rather pay for everything upfront ahead of time, like paying for all the buffet dinners or spa time than having them see me pay every single time. I was thinking about taking them to Pala in SD but would rather find something a bit closer. Does anyone have any ideas? If it's really worth it, I wouldn't mind taking them somewhere past LA.
Going to a casino for the first time can be a very exciting experience. We’re not talking about going to the small venue casinos which have dozens of slots, a smoke vibe and a single table with electronic roulette. No, we’re talking about going to a massive casino, spa and resort where you can take advantage of everything the establishment has to offer. You can gamble on the many games these casinos have in stock, but you can also spend days enjoying yourself without spending a single penny on the casino games. In this article we will help you in how to have fun at the casino and simply use your little Casino Near Me. https://preview.redd.it/51ebkwr946n41.png?width=800&format=png&auto=webp&s=e0bce0648505c7577b9e8607d6a67a554b0913ed What to do at a casino? Well the obvious answer is to gamble. You can easily get lost in the thousands of slot machines which dominate the casino floor, including the progressive jackpots where one lucky spin can easily change your life. If you’re looking for a more relaxed atmosphere head over to the tables. Here you can put your skills to the test against the dealer on the Blackjack tables or chase your lucky number on the roulette wheel. If you hear a commotion on the table floor, don’t worry. It’s just the crowd gathered around the craps table cheering the shooter up. Whatever you chose you are guaranteed to have fun and feel the adrenaline rush from gambling with real money. Learn all the secrets of the casino games at the following websites: How much money should you bring at a casino? The biggest mistake you can make when you go to a casino for the first time is to bring all of the money you planned for the trip. Being an unexperienced player you can easily get caught up in the end and excitement up losing your money. Every experienced gambler will tell you to go to the casino only with the money you are prepared to lose. You have to understand that casino games are games of chance where the odds are stacked against you. Every casino game has a certain house edge which works in favor of the house. So when you gamble you have a bigger chance of losing than winning. In order to avoid going home broke bring enough money with you to try a few games and have fun. In order to have fun, just because you’re at the casino it doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to gamble. There are many more things you can do during your stay. What to do at a casino besides gamble? Modern casinos and resorts know that they have to offer more to visitors beside casino games. If you’re not a gambler you can easily become bored on the casino floor after some time and look for other things to do. If there’s none to offer, you won’t enjoy your stay and the chances are you won’t come back to the casino again. But with modern resorts you will find plenty of things to do without ever stepping on the casino floor. Here’s a list of 9 things you can do when visiting a modern casino. Enjoy in fine dinning All players at the casino have to eat sooner or later. Many casinos offer buffets where you can eat for a low price or even get comped in a free meal. But nowadays more and more establishments incorporate high end restaurants in their casinos and employ the services of renowned chefs. This serves to attract new people to the casinos, who primarily come for the fine dining. The chances are that they will also spend some money on the casino games, increasing the overall profit. Watch the shows Shows are a big part of casinos today, especially those in Las Vegas. You can often see a popular singer holding a show at some casino on the strip or a casino hosting an event with several celebrities. The shows tend to attract a massive crowd and they are usually sold out weeks in advance. If some of the guests visit the casino floor after the show, again these shows serve to amuse the guest and the casino has a chance to earn some extra profit. Go to an exhibit Casinos are one of the last places that you would expect to host an exhibit. But lately more and more casinos are adding exhibits to attract visitors. This is usually the case with casinos owned by native Americans which show their heritage. Watch other people No, were not talking about creeping the guests by staring at them from some dark corner. Casinos attract people of all sorts and sometimes is can be fun to simply watch them and analyze how they behave on the casino floor. You can also easily start a conversation and socialize with the guests, since most of them are pretty friendly people. Work Casinos are always on the lookout for employees. Massive casinos need a big number of employees to function, starting from the valet parking to the dealers on the tables. If any jobs are available, if you’re interested in taking up a job at the casino you can easily check their website or you can ask around for their HR department and see. Watch a sports game Sports betting is a big thing at pretty much all major casinos. Many of them have sports rooms where you can sit down and enjoy watching a game on massive HD monitors or on the video wall. If you like you can also place a bet or you can simply have a few beers and enjoy the game like you would in your favorite sports bar. Hit the bars Bars are a must have at all major establishments. Every player wants to take a time out and go to the bar for a few drinks and socialize with other people. At some casinos you can also play slots or video poker while at the bar. Today most reputable casinos also open up high end bars to attract a higher clientele. Many of them also open up Hard Rock Café bars in order to attract millennials. Go shopping If you visit a casino with a partner who loves to gamble and it’s simply not your thing, shopping can be a great pastime, especially. You can visit the malls or the many outlet stores which the casino has in place. Some casinos also have brand stores where you can get some discount just for being a guest at the casino. Enjoy the spa’s Visiting the spa can be a great way to kick back and relax after a hard day of gambling. Many casino resorts have spa’s where you can spend hours or even days relaxing. This way visiting the casino can become a very nice holiday and you can come back home refreshed and full of energy, ready to get back to your daily chores. Website -https://woodenwand.org/
Looking at youtube walkthroughs of various cruise ships from the major cruise lines, a common theme seems to be...being ripped off. First of all, I used to wonder why prices would double if you traveled alone. Now it seems obvious that's because the cruise line wants to make up for the money that won't be blown on dining, drinks, entertainment, spas, etc. This ships just appear to be giant malls in which you are trapped for several days to several weeks, and they are full of shops, restaurants, bars, casinos, etc, to take your money. The "all-inclusive" part of your very high daily price is low-end buffet food and access to some common areas / pools. Everything else is just trying to get passengers to plug a vacuum cleaner into their wallets. The adversarial viewpoint is made clear by these cruise lines' policies against passengers bringing their own alcohol -- and even softdrinks! -- aboard. The staterooms are MINUSCULE. Only suites begin to approach the size of a common hotel room except for wildly inflated prices. Even in the suites though the bathrooms are tiny, especially the sad little shower cubes -- those are what you'd find in an RV! A Vegas resort would be cheaper and more luxurious, except the ship gives you access to viewing the ocean. But to enjoy that ocean I'd have to spend big on a tiny balcony and spend even bigger to get good food and drinks unless I wanted to survive on burgers/pizza and water. So, am I missing something? I've never cruised. Is it not as bad as it seems?
Trip report: four nights at Encore for anniversary for $8500
My wife (32F) and I (31F) had our one-year anniversary at Encore for four nights. We had previously spent our honeymoon doing the same Encore trip. All together, we’ve been to Vegas five times and Reno two times since meeting a few years ago. Heaven on Earth Cost: all-in, including transportation, lodging, entertainment, food, etc, we spent $8500. That includes our bankrolls of $1600 each. My wife left with $400 of her bankroll and I actually won $500, but we don’t return any of that to offset the $8500, we just add it to next trip’s bankroll. Lodging: we went with Encore, our favorite casino resort in the world. We prefer it to Wynn because it’s more intimate, has the Players Lounge (a special casino pit with couches and dealers in classy black dresses), sometimes has lower limits than Wynn, doesn’t get much tourist traffic from the strip or Palazzo, and it has natural light from the pool and the atrium next to high limit. Both Wynn and Encore are on the quieter side, but Encore even more so. We got the Panoramic Suite, which is the same as the regular Resort Suite, just on a higher floor. Comps: at the end of the trip I spoke with the on-duty casino host about comps. He gave me $150 and my wife $100 off our bill. I felt that was more than generous. While we did give them a ton of play (maybe 6 hours a day), we’re low rollers. I play craps, blackjack, baccarat, pai gow poker, pai gow tiles, and three card poker. My wife plays craps, blackjack, pai gow poker, three card poker, roulette, and slots. She goes to sleep earlier, which probably explains the difference in comps. Sat: we landed at 2pm after a slight delay. My wife surprised me by having a black Escalade waiting to take us to Encore. I’m a sucker for SUVs. We were directed to the express (electronic) check-in, which couldn’t scan our IDs or find our reservations, but an attendant helped us. We opted to wait for a strip-facing room, and were rewarded with a top floor (63rd) room. We changed in the bathroom and gave our bags to the bellhop, heading straight to the pool. There was a great energy there, lots of people, very sunny. We played $15 craps and got in the water. Encore Pool Casino After changing we had a wonderful dinner at Andreas. My wife is allergic to shellfish so she loves their vegan sushi. I tried foie gras which was too rich. After that we gambled for many hours in the Players Lounge, playing $10 craps and $15 blackjack (6:5). The cocktail waitress was able to get me port wine for free by going to the bars. We tried out Night Swim at Encore Beach Club. Total disaster, I’ll spare you the full story, but they put us in the regular line (not expedited entry that hotel guests get), and the pool was closed. We left 30 seconds after getting in and a great floor manager at the casino later that night helped us get a refund and gave us a ticket for a free meal at Jardin. That’s Encore service :-) Sun: started the day at Jardin. A beautiful restaurant but I find their options a little bit limited. Subtract alcohol and eggs and half the menu is gone! After that we went to the spa. Super beautiful and relaxing. I got my hair cut and styled at the salon, followed by makeup. My wife got a blowout. We both felt great after that and took lots of pictures. We headed over to Bellagio to play craps and eat dinner at Prime. We were nearly alone on the patio facing the fountains. Prime's patio Food was just amazing. The filet we split was an earthy brown on the inside. I wonder if that’s from dry aging, or from doing it sous vide. Either way the best filet I’ve ever had. Filet at Prime After that we went to Caesars to see Absinthe. It was super loud, but the show was fantastic!! Beauty at Absinthe :P Absinthe performers After the show we met with a colleague of mine in Caesars who was in town for a conference and showed him how to play craps. We finished the night at Encore, gambling mostly in the Players Lounge. Mon: woke up a little hung over to a room service breakfast of bacon, hash brown, and beignets. We went to check out Red Rock Casino but left in a grumpy state after an hour because of how loudly they play country pop in there, as well as commercials for their Players’ Card, which sounds just like a bad radio station ad, and creates a terrible atmosphere. For lunch we ate at Charlie’s Bar & Grill, and checked out Wynn’s completely redesigned sports book. The hot dog was great. I decided to get my first ever massage at Encore spa. It was beyond amazing, so profesional, so skilled. I used the hot tubs and reading room too. My wife took the opportunity to nap. I was doing well on bankroll so I played some $25 at 3:2 blackjack (instead of $15 at 6:5). Then we went to the buffet. We ate too much! But it was amazing. I made sure to get plenty of crab legs this time, while my wife was given a personal tour from the chef to show her what was safe to eat. He even offered to personally cook any item separately to make certain there was no cross-contamination with shellfish. Wynn Buffet We both felt uncomfortably stuffed after that. Gambling in the Players Lounge rounded out a great day. Tues: woke up to a delicious mango from room service. The day before they said no mangoes were ripe. If they don’t have a perfect mango, they don’t serve it :-) We walked to to Venetian/Palazzo. We ate lunch at Grimaldi’s which served a wonderful thin crust pizza in a NY themed setting. Pizza at Grimaldi We toured the mall, got some Honolulu cookies, and gambled in the Venetian. It was a little hectic in there for my taste. However, you can play in the high limit room for only a $50 bacc bet, which I thought was a great value. Next we did the Star Wars virtual reality attraction, which we loved. After that we went to Palazzo. I liked that Palazzo was less crowded, with fewer tourists running through. I played some $25 Pai Gow Poker in the green chip pit next to the high limit room while wifey played slots--she was very excited to find a Casablanca machine. We canceled our dinner reservations at Lakeside and decided to get room service. I ate a delicious Reuben sandwich with chicken noodle soup and she ate a cheese melt with tomato soup. We finished the night in Encore’s Player Lounge as usual. Weds: we started with room service of scrambled eggs and english muffins. While my wife packed I talked to the casino host who gave us some great comps off our room bill. I played some bacc in the high limit room, winning $300 as a fantastic sendoff. My wife, on her way out, placed a single $100 blackjack (3:2) bet and got dealt a ten and an ace, blackjack! It was a great moment. The black Escalade took us to McCarran and we were on our way! Lessons learned: sleep in or you won’t feel right the rest of the day. Don’t try to eat too many high-end meals, they’re just too rich and leave us feeling overstuffed. Don’t go to the nightclubs if you’re expecting the same kind of personalized friendly service you get elsewhere on property. They’re pretty gruff, probably from dealing with drugged out 20-somethings. And the biggest lesson of all: spend a little extra to get exactly the trip you want. Encore charges a premium but to us it’s more than worth it. Thanks for Reading :-)
List of mystery box items 737 I think .., no golden goose realty
Link https://tstoaddicts.com/2019/03/13/in-game-update-classless-reunion-mini-event-is-live/ Acid Pools Acorn Kirk Adil Hoxha African Tree Resort Air Fortress Ajax Steel Mill and Roscoe Akiro and The Happy Sumo Alcatraaaz and Mansion Alison Taylor and Taylor House All American Apu All Seeing Eye Alley McBalls Ambulance Ancient Burial Ground Ancient Ruins Animatronic Bears Annual Gift Man Apus Apocalypse Jeep Aqua World Arc De Triomphe Ark of the Stonecovenant Arnie Pye Asia DeCuba Atlantis Atombic Bomb Attack Helicopter Auxillary Agency HQ Aztec Theatre Baby Gerald Bad Dream House and the Raven Bagpipe Bus Balance Beam and Gymnastics Lisa Banana Dictatorship Bandit Fort Bare Chested Willie Barney and Bowlarama Barracks Bart Balloon Bartman Cave Bartman Cave Basketball Game Battle Dome Battling Seizure Robot BBQ Pig Beach Hideaway Beach House Bear Cave Beer N Brawl and Lurleen Beersein Wiggum Belle and Maison Derriere Best Snowman Ever BGM and the Jazz Hole Big Bug House Big Butt Skinner Balloon Big Claw Big Digi Ben Black Leather Plane Blackbeard Blackbeard and Ghost Pirate Airship Blarney Castle Blasting Bass Blocko Store Blue Haired Lawyer Blue Nerd Blue Nerd Knight Blue Nerd Rogue Boardwalk Fountain Bob Clones Bob’s Victorian House Bonestorm Santa Bookaccinos Boxing Ring Brandine Brother Faith Van Brutus Bandit Buckingham Palace Buckingham Pay Less Motel Bumblebee Mand Burns Basketball Stadium Burns Coffin Burns Limo Caesars Pow Wow Casino and Chief Café Kafka Caged Tom Turkey Camera Hat Homer Camping Tent Candy Apple Island Candy Kevin Captain Bob Carnival Float Cartoon Motel Cartoon Set Cat Bus Catapult Cavewoman Booberella Cayman Island Banker Cemetery Plot Cesears Pow Wow Sign Chateau Maison Cheddarbarrel Combine Chest of Sacred Artifacts Chester and Unfinished Shed Chez Guevara Chimp Refuge Chinese Acrobatic Theatre Chinese Junk Chinese Restaurant Chinese Takeout Box Chippy Chocolate Chapel Chopper Ride Chripy Boy and Bart Jr Christmas Tree Ralph Circle of Death Classified Records Claus Co Clobber Girl Coat of Foxes Krusty Colosseum Column Mansion CONRAD Cool Brown House and Cool Homer Costingtons and Mr. Costington Cozy Hammock Crap Silo Crate of Fireworks Crazy Cat Lady and House Crazy Plane Cremo Bot Cristo of Springfield Crouching Panda Hidden Eggroll Curvaceous Cave and Cavewoman Booberella Cybord Snake Cypress Creek Elementary Cypress Creek Home Cypress Creek Sign Dancing Reindeer Dead Lobster Death Mountain and Dr Colossus Death to Homer Missile Department of Magical Vehicles Der Krazy Kraut and Becky Deuces Caboose Chili Dogs Devil Flanders Devil Float Dia-Betty and Motherloving Sugar Go Disco Stu and Disco DMV Limo Dodgeball Court Donut Boat Donut Store Donut Torture Device Donut Truck Doorbell Fiesta Van Dr Lenny’s Lab Dr. Nick Dragon Bundle Drive In Theater Drone Duff Barney Blimp Duff Beer Car Duff Blimp Duff Center Arena Duff Gardens Duff McShark Tank Duff Party Bus Duff Party Liner Duff Stadium Duff Statue of Liberty Duffman and Duff Brewery Dunking Device Easter Island God Ebenezer Burns Efcot Center Egg Nog Bar Egyptian Playground Eisenhower 4×4 and Ike Elder Blimp Electric Car Bundle Elf Home Elf Hotel Elf Toy Workshop Bell Elixir Mixer Elysium Project Enriched Learning Center EPA Hoverjet ESBN Sports Desk Eski Moes Evil Shop Keeper Bundle Exotic Petting Zoo Eyeballs of Death Eygyptian Tent Fairy Kodos Fake Toll Booth Fancy Farms Fantastical Beastarium Father Sean Fatov Femme Fatale Ferris Wheel Festive Light Plunger Fever Cabin Fiddler Filthy Angles Orphanage Fire Eater Fireman Apu Fireman Homer Fireworks Barge Fireworks Candy and Puppy Dogs First Bank of Springfield First Church of Lard Lad First Class Lounge Five Alarm Chili Stand Five Corners Flag Bundle Flanders Frozen Car Football Nelson Football Target Football Uprights Forgotten Grave Formless Terror Fort Sensible Fortress of Lonelitude Fortune Megastore and Arthur Francesca and Italian Villa Freakmobile Freedom French Waiter Frink and his Lab Frinkosonic MHV Frink’s Mechano Spider Frink’s Robot Dog Frinkthetic Egg Generator Mk1 Frinkthetic Egg Generator MkII Frosty the Hitman Fruit Bat Man Funzo Bundle Future Monument Future Proofed Home Futuristic Jet Gabbo and Arthur Garbage Truck Ghost Zapper Giant Burning Goat Giant Ferris Wheel Giant Grasshopper Giant Lobster Scorpion Giant Outdoor Fireplace Giant Robot Giant Screamapillar Giant Snow Globe Gingerbread House Gingerbread Mansion Gino and It’s A Wonderful Knife Giuseppe and his Workshop Globex Compound Gold Records on Walls Studio Golden Calf Idol Golf Course Gone Fission Gorgeous Grampa Gorgeous Grampa Bundle Great Wall Tower Greta and Springfield Prep Grub Shack Guitar Central Gypsy Fortune Teller Shop and Maude Half Pipe Hammock District Handsome Pete Hanger 18 Hangman Cage Hank and Volcano Lair Hans Moleman Havana Private Home Health Spa Heimlich Machine Hellementary School Helter Shelter Herb Powell and Powell Motors Hi Glow Waste Barrels Himeji Castle Holiday Tree Holis and Springfield Historical Society Home of Tomorrow Homer Dog Homerclese Statue Homer’s Ballet Hooch City Hootenanny Barn Hot Air Balloon Hot Springs Hot Squishee Station Hot Tub House on Scary Hill Hover Copter Howards Flowers Hugs Bunny I Choo Choo Choose You Train Ice Cream Truck and Ice Cream Homer Ice Palace Ice Sculpture Couch Gag Scene Imaginary Bear Impossible Tower Improvised Snare Inanimate Carbon Rod Monument Incubator Think Tank Inflatable Gorilla and Baboons IRS Drone Itchy and Scratchy Billboard Itchy and Scratchy Bots Itchy Balloon Itchy Mascot Itchy’s 70s Disco Itchy’s Mine Field Jacques and Fiesta Terrace Jasper and Springfield Community Center Jay G Bundle Jazzy Goodtimes Jesse Grass Jessica and Lovejoy House Jesus and Heavenly Swingset Jet Engine Bike Jewish Heaven Jimbo Lucius Sweet Johnny Tightlips and Platos Casino Juggler Julio and Hairy Shearers Juvenile Correction Facililty K9 Officer Kamp Bart & Kamp Krusty Kane Manor Kearney Kearney’s Other Son King Homer’s Skyscraper King Snorky King Winter and his Cave Kingsize Homer Bundle Knifey Spoonet and Crocky Waters Knightboat Kodos Krusty Fountain Krusty Mansion Krusty Station Krustylu Studios Krustys Kristmas on Ice Krusty’s One Plate Maximum Buffet Kwik-E-Mart Central Office La Belle Frottage Land Octopus Pen Lard Lad Donuts Laura Powers and Powers House Le Krusty Burger Left Handed Roadster Life Sized Spruce Moose Limo Lincolns Cabin Ling Bouvier Lisa Lionheart Lisa Statue Little Helper Ralph Little Lady Justic Little Lisa’s Recycling Plant Lobster Island Lotto N Liquor and Mr. Largo Luann and Cracker Factory Luft Waffles Lugash and Gym Lumpy Bundle Macaronis Shed Madame Chaos and Mindy Magic Palace Manacek and Brick Townhomes Manger Manjula and Apu’s Apartment Mansion of Solid Gold Mapple Store Mars Colony Marvin Monroe Tombstone Mary and Springfield Opry House Maude Praiseland Statue Mausoleum and Zombie Mayan Bundle Mexican Duffman and Lady Duff Mexican Duffman Bundle Milhouse’s Trailer Milo and Coolsville Mime Mini Nuclear Warhead Miss Springfield and Sleep Eazy Motel Model Donut Moe’s House Mojo Helper Monkey Money Poll Monorail Café Montgomery Burns State Prison Moog Mount Carlmore Mozert and Concert Hall Mr. Plow Mr. Sparkle Billboard Mr. Sparkley Mt. Krustmore Murderhorn Murderpuss Muscle Marge and Shapes Gym Museum of Swordfish Mutant Peacock Mutant Rabbit Mystical Self Defence National Bank of Springfield Nativity Scene Natural Faberge Egg Nickel n Dime Animation Nighthawk Diner and Rex Nightmare Pile Ninja Homer Practice Snake Nixon and Scandelgate Hotel Norbert’s Plane North Pole Station Not a Laser Shark Pool Number 111 Number 12 Number 14 Number 2 Number 21 Number 22 Number 29 Number 314 Number 5 Number 50 Number 51 Number 59 Number 67 Number 79 Number 85 Oasis Oktoberfest Gate Old English Station Old Faithless Old Gray Mare Old Mine Old Simpson Farm Old Tree Spirit Old West Sign Open Air Stage Opera Krusty Oscars Obstacles Truck Outlands Factory Outlands Sign and Mountain Man Pagon Bonfire Park Engineer Patches and Poor Violet Peacock Lounge Peekimon Park Pet Cemetery Pet Mutant Plant Pet Mutant Seedling Pharaoh Skinner and Throne Phineas Q Butterfats Pie Man Epic Statue Pies and Explosives Pile Pies for Funs Booth Piggly’s Super Smorg Pigs of Paradise Pen Pin Pals Bundle Pinkbeardy Yogurt Pinwheel Firework Pirate Kang Pirate Prison Plane Bot Planet Htype Plastic Prison Plastic Surgery Center Plow King Pokey Police Car Police Tank Polo Field House Pompeii Ruins Pont Du Gard Pope and St. Pauls Basilica Poppa Wheelies Portal to Rigel 7 Powell Mansion Prairie Maggie Prehistoric Jungle Preppers Compound Presidential Estate P-Rex and Tar Pits Pride of Ulster Banner and Leprechaun Princess Princess K and Florence of Arabia Prospector Pumpkin House Puritan Flanders Queen H and The Castle of Equalia Quick and Fresh Quicksand Quimborghini Quitters Rabbi K and Temple Beth Springfield Radiant BS Station Radioactive Man Billboard Radioactive Man Bundle Radioactive Man Film Set Radioactive Man Milhouse Radish Station Rancho Relaxo Raouls Penthouse Raptor Ray Gun Ray Patterson Reagan and the Reeducation Center Recycle Fort Red Nerd Knight Red Nerd Rogue Red Nerd Warrior Refrigeratorium ReNeducation Center Republican Party HQ Retro Lard Lad Rich Texan Rigellian Queen Rio Days Inn Ero Robby the Automaton Robot Robot Ant Bundle Rocket Car and Chester Rocket to Your Doom Roger Meyers Story Rolling Rock Rommelwood Barracks Rose and Capital City Capitol Building Rotating Religious Holo Statue Royal Tokyo Rubber Baby Buggy Bumpers and Babysitter Bandit Russ Cargill Sacagawea Santa Santa’s Anvil Santa’s Little Helper Santa’s Plane Sled Santa’s Village Santa’s Workshop Sarah Wiggum and Springfield Aquarium Satellite Station Saxophone Lisa Scary Dock School Bus and Otto Sconewall Smithers Scratchy Mascot Self Reliant House Senor Ding Dong’s Doorbell Fiesta and Senor Ding Dong Sepulchre of Evil Sequel Shop Serfsons House Shaboom Kaboom Café Shadow Knight and Throne Shary Bobbins Shauna She She Lounge Sherri and Terri Shinning Hotel and Maze Shiva Shiva Statue Shooting Car Shortys Sidekick Milhouse Simpson Houseboat Simpson Laser Tag Ski Chalet Skulls Island Slaghold SLH Topiary Slide Factory Smooches on the Beach Snake with Rudolph Sneeds Feed and Seed Snow Monster Snowman Bundle Snub Club Snugglers Cove Sophie Krustofski Soul Extraction Institute Southern Cracker Fountain Space Barney Space Coyate and Pro Shop Space Shuttle Spellementary Library Spellementary Mess Hall Spider Willie Sportacus Spotlight Dancing Bot Sprawl Mart Springfield Animal Shelter Springfield Aslyum Springfield Bowl Springfield Cemetery Springfield Clamphitheater Springfield Falls Springfield Famers Markey Springfield Glenne Condos Springfield Gorge Springfield Greenhouse Springfield Heighs Opera House Springfield Hunting Supplies and Connor Grant Springfield Hyperstadium Springfield Museum Springfield Museum of Natural History Springfield Observatory Springfield of Tomorrow Sign Springfield Pet Shop and Jub Jub Springfield Shopper Springfield Sign Springfield Skating Rink Springfield Welcomes Bob Sign Springfield YMCA and Coach K Springy Spruce Caboose Sqanky Fish Squawky Squeaky Voice Teen Squirrel Luann Stack of Beer Stacy and Malibu Stacy HQ Stacy’s Dream House Stampy Ballon Star Spawn Statue of Burns STEM Conference Hotel Stiletto Scuplture Stone of Triumph Stonecutter Lodge and Number 1 Stonecutter Table Stonecutter Tunnel Stoners Pot Palace Street Cleaner Strongman Homer Stunt Bike Sugarloaf Mountain Sumatran Century Flower Sungazer Tour Bus Super Collider Super Sexy Flanders and Ski Lift Swelldorado Tailgate Taste of Duff Truck Tatum and Springfield Coliseum T-Ball Stand Teddy and Springfield National Park Teleporters (4) Tennis Court Tennis Machine TGI McScratchys The Collider The Egg Council Guy The Fracker The Grand Pumpkin The Gridiron The Grumple The Homer The League of Extra Horny Gentleman The Mayflower The Nag and Weasel and Guy Incognito The Paralyzer The Peek Inn The Scout Master The Stable at the Inn The Wiccans The Yes Guy THOH 2018 Witch Three Eyed Whale Time Travel Toaster Tappables Tire Fire Tourist Bundle Tower of Babel Town Square Training Plane Treasure Chest Truckasaurus Try N Save Tunnel of Love Turkey Stuffing Machine Turn Your Head and Coif Tuxedo Krusty Twirl n Hurl Twonicorn UFP Ultrahouse 2 Unoriginal Log Ride Up Up and Buffet UPA Talent Agency Uriah’s Heap Recycling Center and Hippie US Capitol Building USS Tom Clancy Uter and the Hungry Hun Valentines Pond Vehicle Pileup Vesuvius Pizza Vicious Monkeys Victorian UFO Victors Secret Wailing Wall Walking Kwik-E-Mart Washington and Cherry Tree Water Show Fountain Waterslide Tree Waverly Hills Elementary School Welcome to Springfield Sign Westminster Abbey Whack A Mole Whale White Witch Burns Wholesome Publishing WII Tank Wild West Film Set Wildlife Sanctuary Willie’s Tractor Wilted Rose Witch Marge and Cauldron Wizard Martin Wonder Films Woodstock Wooly Bully Wooly Mamoth Pen Work From Home Station World Wide Broadcast Dish Worm Train X Ray Truck Yardwork Simulator Ye Olde Off Ramp Inn Yellow Submersible Zip Zap and Za Zombie Zombie Sandwich Zutroy
We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.
Tulalip Resort Casino is an Indian casino and resort in Quil Ceda Village, Washington, owned and operated by the Tulalip Tribes of Washington. It opened in 2004 as Tulalip Casino, and was renamed in late 2007 because of the new hotel, which opened August 15, 2008. In addition to the AAA Four Diamond award-winning 12-story hotel with 370 rooms and suites, the resort includes 192,000 square feet (17,800 m2) of gaming space. The property has 7 restaurants: Tulalip Bay, Blackfish, Cedars Cafe, The Draft Bar and Grill, Journeys East, Eagles Buffet and Canoes Carvery. The T Spa is the resort's onsite spa and features 14,000 square feet (1,300 m2) of treatment rooms. There are also meeting facilities, and the Canoes Cabaret, Orca Ballroom, and Tulalip Amphitheatre for entertainment events. DO NOT GO GENTLE INTO A DOMESTIC FIGHT I had just passed through Arlington when the Taco Time began to take hold. The meaty filling and breathtaking sauces had begun to plummet my belly's pH level to a low that now refused all immigrants to my stomach like a pack of Texans at a gun show in a Trump convention. Or something. I turned to my wife and told her we were going to need to stop. This was a mistake. She beamed at me and said "How about the Outlet Mall?" I would like to say I didn't shit my pants. But I shit my pants. I needed to pull over and a thought occurred to me. Well, two thoughts: fireworks and the casino. Any able bodied Washingtonian should know that the Outlet Mall in Tulalip is a win situation. In fact, it's not a bad idea to tell your wife that "Hey, you deserve a treat - let's go to the Outlet Mall in Tulalip." And then drive her up there, stay for the Banana Republic and Starbucks and then "Hey, hon, I might have more fun if I went over to the casino." And then drink until she has to drive and gamble until she has to take all the clothing she bought at the mall back. So, it was off to the Outlet Mall. Luckily, they sold underwear. THERE IS NO OUTLET AT THE OUTLETS Nothing in life is free. And nothing in life is easy. So, I did have to purchase new underwear and I had a little more trouble than I imagined getting out of the Outlet Mall. The mall seems extremely escapable as it's outside. However, you must be quick with your "Ho-hum, I'll just go to the Casino" story. You must say it nonchalant and give your partner a look that says "I can take it or leave it". Unfortunately for me, she replied "Maybe next time." I forgot that our chance adventure at the Outlet Mall was a product of me shitting my pants and not a gift on a Saturday of spousal Outlet shopping. "Look" I said. "I need to sit down and rest. We just spent the last five hours driving from Canada down here and Taco Time made me shit my pants AND I had to go into Banana Republic. I need to chill. This is important to me." Telling a loved one something is important to you is very important. You must use it wisely. She gave me a look that said that she wouldn't forget it, but I got clearance to leave. I nodded her adieu and made my way through the Outletters. There is a sick notion in the American mind that goods and services can be had on the cheap by venturing into an Outlet Mall. Nothing can be further from the truth. In fact, the new underwear I was wearing had already begun to split at the seams. There is a reason the Outlets are far away from civilization - it impedes returns. Teams of tourists surrounded me, looking for bargains, when all I wanted to do was get away from them. The cheap kitchenware and taffy were not the drugs I needed at this time. I needed fireworks, beer, and that feeling that only comes when you pull cash out of a credit card to get your bank account back from the greedy wheel at the roulette table. "Back, you!" I shouted at the Scientologist that is a permanent fixture at the Outlet Mall. "But it's just a personality test!" She screamed after me. "I take that personal!" I screamed back. Into a Japanese tourist I slammed and spilled their belongings of muffin pans, omelet makers, and fudge named after some damn mountain in Montana that no one knows about or wants to. Security was on me and took a hold of my collar and shook me like a bag of gold. "Out of here, you joker!" the guard yelled. "Thank you." I whispered as he shoved me out into the parking lot and on my way to the firework stand. TWO NATIONS MEET There's nothing like a firework stand. Well, nothing like a good one: the kind that will sell you enough explosives to get sanctions slapped on you. Tulalip was one. Much like sister city Auburn, Tulalip did not disappoint in the firework department. They had razzlers, tazzlers, jizzles and phazims. They had rollies, tollies, gollies, and bazims. I made all those words up, but the point is that you simply point at the biggest cannon you see at the stand and say "I'll take that." Some of the fireworks are themed. There's a Terminator themed pack full of cannons and mortars. There's a Star Wars themed pack of cannons and mortars. There's even a Celebrity Chef pack that has...cannons and mortars. Because of my hurry and my need to return to my loving wife within the two hours it would take her to figure out nothing fits, I went for the bone: the stuff they pretend they won't sell you unless you act like something illegal is going on. I approached the fireworks dealer. "Sir - I would like - come closer." "Yes?" The man asked. "I hear your firework stand is the best." I cozied up to the register and began toying with a pack of Saturn Missiles seductively. "Big Tits and Ass Fireworks is the best. My grandfather built Big Tits and Ass Fireworks with his bare hands! Tulalip Nation!" The man screamed and the other firework dealers screamed back. "Yes, that's all well and good. It is a fine establishment. But tell me this...." "Yesssss?' He asked, winking. "Can I get..." "Yessss?" "A tennis ball full of....." "Gun powder?!" My head shot up and I looked at him cross and said "Good lord, no! Cocaine! Cocaine, my good man! I want to buy cocaine from you!" Again I was tossed out of an outlet. This time it was the fireworks kind. I had flown too close to the sun. I figured I'd get some sparklers. Then I figured a mortar. Then I figured an M80. Then I just went all in and asked for cocaine. I was severely off my game. THE CASINO I got back in the car and began cursing the Tulalip Nation in the only language I knew: English. Sure, I took some sign language and Spanish, but I didn't remember most of it and wasn't going to Google it. Not now. Not with the casino a half a mile away. I parked the car and took out a cigarette from a pack I kept in the trunk for just such an occasion: shitting your pants, getting kicked out of an outlet mall, trying to buy cocaine, and then getting kicked out of a firework stand. I called it Old Smokey. Tulalip Casino is a majestic building that greets you with fountains and lights and all the majesty of realizing you are about to lose money you don't have to a video game themed on the premise of milking money out of a cow. As you enter, the smoke comes on you like hot fudge on a sundae if hot fudge was smoke and you were a sundae. The atmosphere reminds you of a wedding some uncle had before he went to jail for a crime that the family will not acknowledge in public. From room to room you feel that rush of being a racial minority for the first time in your life, only to become just another white guy leering at a cocktail waitress behind aviator glasses in the next room - complicating this is the fact that you're Korean. There's an aroma of food under the nicotine and perfume, but you can't quite make out what it might be. It could be spare ribs or it could be Pad Thai, but what it won't be is good. There is no good food made by human beings that can be carried from poker table to poker table in a plastic sack. Sure, there's the nice restaurant where you sit down and eat your food at a table instead of in your car crying as you try to figure out how you're going to tell your wife that you lost the life savings and all you got out of it was a free bag of sliders and fries...but you don't want to sit down and eat food like a human. You want to gamble. Like most casinos, the Tulalip has a club you can join to lose money within a kind of fraternal order of losers. Sure, you'll get free money and smokes and food, but those things just keep you anchored to that casino. No, the real pros skip the club and lose on their own terms. Like me. It was time to lose money the only way I knew: video slots. Video slots are like the slot machines of old, only they have little video games within them where you get entertained as you pay for three computers and a college education for a Tulalip Nation member's family. There are bonuses, free spins, and even quests where you lose money by way of slaying dragons or orcs or zombies. I slid a hundred in and began navigating a gnome around a fairytale castle hoping to hit the jackpot that would possibly pay off my car, but certainly wouldn't make me a rich man. As I slid hundred after hundred in the machine, the damn gnome continued to get lost in the flower city of Zambel. I shouted at the gnome "JESUS, WILL YOU PICK THE CORRECT DOOR - THIS IS COSTING ME MONEY!" But the gnome failed to pick the right door and I was out 800 dollars. I went to the bar. THE CASINO AND BEYOND "At least I can get drunk now." I was left to my own shame in a bar in the casino, nursing a beer and trying to imagine how to rob the Wal Mart next door and actually make any money. I had another half hour before I would have to meet my wife and explain how we couldn't have kids now. "You seem down on your luck." The bartender looked at me from behind a mask of years of inbreeding. His eyes were fused and his cycloptic movements made me cringe as he pushed a matchbook across the table to me. "Meet this man at the city limits." "You mean the Exit door?" "Yes." I couldn't possibly see how this man (T.C. said the matchbook) or any other man could help me out in the predicament the Native Americans had put me in. Oh, who was I kidding, it was my fault! And the Native Americans. And my wife's. If she wouldn't have shit her pants on the way home - but I must not blame, I thought. "Hear you need a job, kid." It was Tom Cruise. "What the hell are you doing here?" "I own this place." "Really?" "Hell no. I had to take a piss on the way home from Canada. You lose some money?" "It's true, Mr. Cruise! I am guilty of gambling! But the Native Americans made me do it. It was some ancient curse, some demon that -" "Speaking of ancient curses - have you heard about Xenu?" "No." "Good. Now, I hear you need some money." "YES! I DO! Did the cyclops tell you?" "The...no, that's John Travolta." "He's a bartender?" "No. He's a drunk. Look, you want to make some money or not?" "I don't have to...?" I made a gesture with the hotdog I always keep in my pocket for just such instances. "Let me just show you." THE NEXT DAY "Free personality test!" I yelled at the Japanese tourist.
Going to Vegas in July - I've been doing my research so hope this can help others.
I'm going in July and have done some research. Plenty of this is from the sidebar, but other notes are from many of other sources. The Vegas Degenerate Tour ( . ) ( . ) Things to do:
Bellagio Fountains (free)
Mirage Volcano Show (free)
The lounge at the top of the Mandarin Oriental - Super Classy with amazing night time views, sexy patrons and great cocktails
Wet Republic - Rent cabana 2 months in advance
Las Vegas Helicopter Night Flight with VIP Transportation £65pp
Grand Canyon Skywalk - Apparently Expensive and not that good - you have to take a bus to get there and it is $30 each. Go to Grand Canyon south instead.
The Strip Gun Club Range
Sapphires pool party - strippers pool party!!!
Fremont Street Experience at night.
Container Park, which is a few blocks east of the Freemont St. Experience, a 2 foot recycled steel praying mantis (acquired from Burning Man) spits giant fireballs to the beat of music A LOT. Lots of half naked men and women. LOTS (free)
Ghost Bar at the Palms has amazing views. Check Groupon for deals. Happy hour 8-10pm
Stratosphere bar at the top. Happy hour 2 hours after open
High Roller observation wheel. Get a car with the open bar.
Monte Carlo minus 5 Ice bar. Everything is made out of ice! Bar, glasses, seating - everything
RiRa Irish bar with live music and good Guinness after 9pm
The Foundation Room at Mandalay Bay, live music and amazing strip views
Strip clubs: Spearmint Rhino, Hustler Club and Crazy Horse--those are our top 3 Rhino and Horse are high end and classy
Top Golf location, just behind MGM. 5 levels of golf driving range, mixed with music, food and drinks. There are also 2 pools, free to use.#
Dig This drive diggers and bulldozers.
Spa in the ARIA is amazing with good treatments.
Alibi show http://alibitheshow.com/ This experience throws the audience into an exciting adventure around the streets, restaurants, bars and other real-life locations on the Las Vegas Strip.
There is so much free stuff going on up and down the strip though that you can just do all the free stuff and not spend a dime. From street dancers, people singing, or pictures with a grown dude wearing a diaper.
Eclipse cinemas downtown for an over 21s only luxury cinema experience with cocktails and good food.
Have the clubs pick you up in their limos because all the cab/ubelyft/limo drivers get a kick back on anyone they drop off to the clubs and same with the VIP card guys! So if you don't use the free limo ... THE CLUB HAS TO CHARGE YOU A COVER!!! If you use the clubs FREE limo service they can sometimes wave that cover charge!! (that's like $20 a person!)
Check for Groupon deals.
Make sure you all download the Uber and Lyft app. Both offer new user signup credits. Free rides.
A $400 Pre-Authorisation charge for resort fees and ‘amenities’ was taken as expected upon check in. I would recommend UK visitors to take a Cash Passport MasterCard (available in Thomas Cook and other travel agents)
é by Jose Andres inside Jaleo inside Cosmo. Only 8 seats, reservations by email only ([email protected]) starting 3 months prior to the res date, 23 courses. $190/person(?) without alcohol pairing
Raku in Chinatown does amazing 8/12 course tastings for $70/100 a person
The tasting, or "seasonal discover menu" at L'Atelier is up to $165 per person
Eiffel Tower restaurant is a Must for dinner!!!!!!!! Fantastic view of the strip
Good steakhouses serve food at the restaurant bar and the bartender has seen some shit. So much more fun for a party up to three and the service is over the top.
Delmonico's in Venetian at the bar. The cocktails and food were amazing.
Mushashi's dirty show (Japanese steak with a naughty show for the girls.) Midnight to 4am happy hour.
Secret Pizza. A secret pizza place. Needs research! Inside the Cosmopolitan
Bachi Burger – also to reunite with a previous memory. I still think this is one of the top 3 burgers I’ve ever had. The oxtail chili cheese fries are recommended by others to be a “must”, but I personally prefer the truffle fries.
Monta Ramen – I’m a huge ramen fan and I understood this was the –best- ramen place in Vegas.
Sweets Raku – in the same complex as Monta Ramen. They have some neat desserts that they make right in front of you, lovely experience.
Wicked Spoon Buffet at the Cosmo. Everything was really good and the deserts were awesome.
Brunch @ Bacchanal Buffet, Caesar’s Palace – This was awesome! We had the groupon deal and it was impressively cheap. Midway through our meal they switched to their lunch menu so we got the best of both worlds there.
Gordon Ramsey’s Burgr – onion rings were incredible. The burger was pretty good as well.
Earl of Sandwich - I could seriously eat these every day.
Studio B Buffet @ M Resort
The "Heart Attack Grill" lets you eat free if you weigh over 350 pounds.
Marriage Can Be Murder - This is a dinner / theater / murder mystery / whodunit show at the D downtown. Includes tasty food, extreme audience participation and likely embarrassment. You may be called upon to dance, or play a character in the murder mystery. Comes with tasty food, cocktails available.
For dinner, I highly recommend BLT Steak House in Ballys Hotel and Red8 in The Wynn - if you are a food lover, BLT’s is particularly worth the extra!
Sex/Swingers Clubs (Or; no, you filthy pervert - what's wrong with you?)
[Tournament] Paradigm Shift presented by Rhythm City Casino Resort
Paradigm Shift - Presented by Rhythm City Casino Hey guys, I don't have anything to do with this tournament other than I am registered for it, but I didn't see a thread to link/share and I figured the tournament could use some attention from the SSBM subreddit.
Here's the details from the smash.gg page:Paradigm Shift is the premiere tournament of the Great River Valley Region and is brought to you by Paradigm, Rhythm City Casino, and the Macomb Esports Association! The lovely Rhythm City Casino is a wonder away from home! Experience the heart of entertainment in this enormous breathtaking venue in Davenport Iowa! Get the best deal and sign up NOW! Follow our twitter for updates!
Date and Location * DATE: JULY 20TH-21ST, 2019 * LOCATION: DAVENPORT, IA * ADDRESS: 7077 ELMORE AVENUE, DAVENPORT, IA 52807 Featured Games * SUPER SMASH BROS. ULTIMATE SINGLES ($3,875 POT BONUS) DOUBLES ($500 POT BONUS) * SUPER SMASH BROS. MELEE SINGLES ($3,875 POT BONUS) DOUBLES ($500 POT BONUS) * TEKKEN 7 ($500 POT BONUS) * DBFZ ($500 POT BONUS) Side Events (BYOC) * MORTAL KOMBAT 11 ($250 POT BONUS) * STREET FIGHTER V: ARCADE EDITION * SOULCALIBUR VI * PROJECT M + Venue Rhythm City Casino *17,000 SQ. FT. OF EVENT SPACE *COMPLIMENTARY WIFI INTERNET IN ALL GUESTROOMS AND EVENT SPACES *FREE 24 HOUR VENUE FRIDAY + SATURDAY NIGHT Hotel Blocks Book your room with Rhythm City Casino using the code "Paradigm"; directions for booking Best Western Plus SteepleGate Inn: https://tinyurl.com/y5smetng Radisson Hotel: https://www.radisson.com/paradigmshift Property offerings: * 106 HOTEL ROOMS * 850+ SLOT MACHINES * 28 TABLE GAMES * ROBERT’S BUFFET * RUTHIE’S STEAK & SEAFOOD * DRAFT DAY SPORTS LOUNGE * GIFT SHOP * RHYTHM ROOM * FREE ENTERTAINMENT FRIDAY & SATURDAY (21+YEARS OF AGE) * SPA & SALON Payouts for Smash Ultimate and Melee Singles * 1st - 35% * 2nd - 20% * 3rd - 15% * 4th - 10% * 5th - 6.5% * 7th - 3.5% * 9th - $50 * 13th - $25 Payout for Smash Doubles * 1st - 60% * 2nd - 30% * 3rd - 10% Payout for All Other Titles * 1st - 35% * 2nd - 20% * 3rd - 15% * 4th - 10% * 5th - 6.5% * 7th - 3.5% Costs: Venue Fee * $30 EARLY BIRD SPECIAL (3/24/19 - 4/29/19 11:59PM EDT) * $40 (4/30/19 - 6/29/19 11:59PM EDT) * $60 LAST MINUTE REGISTRATION (6/30/19 - 7/13/19 11:59PM EDT REGISTRATION CLOSES) Spectating * SATURDAY SPECTATING W/BADGE - $10 * ALL-TOURNAMENT SPECTATING W/BADGE - $20 Event Fees * MELEE SINGLES - $10 * MELEE DOUBLES - $10 PER PLAYER ($20 PER TEAM) * SMASH ULTIMATE SINGLES - $10 * SMASH ULTIMATE DOUBLES - $10 PER PLAYER ($20 PER TEAM) * PROJECT M SINGLES - $10 PER PLAYER * TEKKEN 7 SINGLES - $10 PER PLAYER * NOTE: POT BONUS ARE SUBJECT TO A LESS AMOUNT IF LESS THAN 15 PLAYERS PARTICIPATE Here's the teaser video.
First, let me say thank you to all of our wonderful readers, users, subscribers, lurkers and whoever happens to stumble bum into our little islands, /Oahu and /Honolulu, in the vast ocean of the Innernet. Hope 2017 was good to you and hope 2018 will be even more better...so...to rock it in properly, here's a handy dandy guide I've put together using a variety of sources. Please verify the information on your own and be aware, there may be changes for any kind of reason. If there are any mistakes or if you'd like to add your own, post a comment here or shoot me a PM. Your 2017 Guide to the Best New Year’s Eve Events and Fireworks in Honolulu - From Honolulu Magazine Eighth Annual New Year’s Eve Party of the Year SATURDAY, DEC. 30 AND SUNDAY, DEC. 31 Party your way into the new year with a two-day festival featuring the electro-pop duo behind “Roses,” “Closer” and “Something Just Like This.” One ticket gets you access to The Chainsmokers concert at Aloha Stadium on Saturday, followed by a countdown to 2018 at Aloha Tower on Sunday with more than 30 bands and DJs on nine stages (including Walshy Fire of Major Lazer), Eat the Street food trucks and, of course, a spectacular fireworks display. Saturday: Aloha Stadium, 99-500 Salt Lake Blvd., ‘Aiea, 5–10 p.m., all ages; Sunday: Aloha Tower Marketplace, 1 Aloha Tower Drive, 7 p.m.–2 a.m., 18 and over; $135–$300, purchase tickets here. Hideout NYE SUNDAY, DEC. 31 Start 2018 right dressed in all-white at The Laylow Hotel’s New Year’s Eve masquerade. Mingle with mysterious guests (thanks to complimentary masks!) out on the open-air lānai and by the pool while you listen to live performances by DJs Revise and Tittahbyte and get your drink on at not one, but two, bars. 2299 Kūhio Ave., 9 p.m.–2 a.m., $50 for the first 200 guests, $75 at the door, purchase tickets here. Majestic! New Year’s Eve Cruise SUNDAY, DEC. 31 All aboard Atlantis Adventures’ Majestic! for a New Year’s Eve with an ocean view of the Waikīkī fireworks, delicious appetizers, celebratory party favors and a complimentary glass of Champagne for a toast at midnight. Pier 6, 1 Aloha Tower Drive, 10:30 p.m.–12:45 a.m., $173, purchase tickets here. Monte Carlo Casino Night at 53 By The Sea SUNDAY, DEC. 31 Try your hand at being James (or Jane) Bond for a night at 53 By The Sea’s glamorous New Year’s Eve party. This black-tie-optional event features casino favorites such as blackjack, craps and roulette, live music, a cigar lounge, a martini bar and a view of the Waikīkī fireworks from the terrace lānai. Each ticket includes casino cash, hors d’oeuvres, drink/cigar tickets, a Champagne toast and party favors. 53 Ahui St., 9 p.m.–1 a.m., 21 and over, $150 per person, $250 per couple, purchase tickets here. New Year’s Eve Celebrations at Hilton Hawaiian Village SUNDAY, DEC. 31 Best known for its Friday-night fireworks in Waikīkī, the Hilton Hawaiian Village outdoes itself with its New Year’s Eve show. The resort invites both visitors and locals to the Great Lawn for live entertainment by Henry Kapono and contemporary surf-rock band Dukes of Surf, a four-course dinner, cultural activities and an impressive fireworks finale over the lagoon. 2005 Kālia Road, 7–11 p.m., all ages, kama‘āina rates: $206 (child) or $256 (adult), purchase tickets here. New Year’s Eve Masquerade Party at SKY Waikīkī SUNDAY, DEC. 31 Start the new year with a bit of mystery at SKY Waikīkī’s annual New Year’s Eve Masquerade Party. Dress to impress in cocktail attire and a mask for a night of hosted appetizers, an open bar featuring Ketel One Vodka cocktails and Veuve Clicquot Champagne and, best of all, a room full of masked strangers. Listen to a live performance by L.A.-based DJ William Lifestyle as you watch Waikīkī’s iconic fireworks show from the top. 2270 Kalākaua Ave., 19th Floor, 8 p.m., 21 and over, $150–$300, purchase tickets here. New Year’s Eve Pineapple Drop at Mililani Town Center SUNDAY, DEC. 31 Forget watching the Times Square ball drop on TV—you can see a 12-by-6-foot pineapple drop in person, right here on O‘ahu. The Mililani Town Center pineapple will drop at 7 p.m. HST (midnight in New York), making this one New Year’s Eve party that you can bring your kids and even your grandparents to. Listen to live music by Mike Love and Maunalua, win prizes in the #WeAreMililani selfie contest, be a part of a massive group dance to the “Electric Slide” and more. 95-1249 Meheula Parkway, #193, Mililani, 2–8 p.m., free, click here for more information. NYE 2018 Presidential Suite Party: Kaleidoscope SUNDAY, DEC. 31 Say goodbye to 2017 in style at the Moana Surfrider’s exclusive New Year’s Eve soirée. This ultra-luxe private party takes place in the hotel’s Presidential Suite on the penthouse level with an unobstructed view of the Waikīkī fireworks. The evening begins with live performances by local artists Starr Kalahiki and Taimane and a variety of cirque performers. Keeping with the kaleidoscope concept, the party’s theme and its menu will change every hour. 2365 Kalākaua Ave., 9 p.m.–2 a.m., 21 and over, $750, purchase tickets here. Rock-A-Hula Midnight New Year’s Rockin’ Eve Show SUNDAY, DEC. 31 Skip the typical New Year’s Eve parties for this midnight edition of Rock-A-Hula that takes you on a musical “Hawaiian Journey” from the 1920s to today. With Elvis Presley, Michael Jackson and Katy Perry tribute artists, hula and fire-knife dancers, a gourmet dinner and fireworks visual effects on the big screen, this show will have you rockin’ into the new year. 2201 Kalākaua Ave., Building B, Fourth Floor, 9:45 p.m.–12:45 a.m., all ages, $61 (child) to $185 (adult), kama‘āina rates available, purchase tickets here. Star of Honolulu 2017 New Year’s Eve Cruise SUNDAY, DEC. 31 Sail into the new year on this midnight cruise featuring live entertainment, party favors and a prime view of the Waikīkī fireworks. Your choice of either a three- or five-course steak-and-lobster dinner comes with a Champagne toast to 2018. 1 Aloha Tower Drive, 10:15 p.m.–12:30 a.m., $89–$257, purchase tickets here. The Countdown 2018 at Stripsteak Waikīkī SUNDAY, DEC. 31 Dance the night away at this New Year’s Eve party hosted by renowned nightlife veterans Blaise Sato and Flash Hansen and featuring sounds by DJs Delve and Hooligan on the Grand Lānai of the International Market Place. Stripsteak will offer a special New Year’s Eve dinner menu with final seating at 8 p.m. A portion of the proceeds will benefit the Hawai‘i Chapter of the Make-A-Wish Foundation. 2330 Kalākaua Ave., #330, 10 p.m.–2 a.m., 21 and over, $20–$50, purchase tickets here. Ring in 2018 with These Fun New Year Cultural Celebrations in Honolulu - From Honolulu Magazine First Day Hike MONDAY, JAN. 1, 2018 The first sunrise of 2018 is at 7:09 a.m. Join more than 700 people who hike to the top of Makapu‘u Point Lighthouse Trail to greet the new year. There’ll be a pū (blowing of a conch shell) followed by an oli blessing and taiko drummers. You’ll be hiking in pitch darkness, so bring a flashlight and arrive before the gates open at 5:30 a.m. to claim a parking spot. It might get chilly and windy at the top of the trail, so bring a light jacket. Makapu‘u Point Lighthouse Trail Hatsumōde 2018 MONDAY, JAN. 1, 2018 Usher in good luck for the new year with your first temple or shrine visit in 2018. This Japanese custom is called hatsumōde. Listen to the sounds of taiko drums, eat ozoni mochi soup (a New Year’s soup with mochi rice cake and seasonal vegetables), then let the Japanese shishi lion lightly bite your head for good luck. Pro tip: Park your car for free at Damien Memorial School and catch a complimentary shuttle to the event. Free, midnight to 5 p.m., Hawai‘i Kotohira Jinsha – Hawai‘i Dazaifu Tenmangu, 1239 Olomea St., (808) 841-4755, e-shrine.org Hatsumohde New Year Celebration MONDAY, JAN. 1, 2018 If you’re planning to stay up late, visit the Daijingu Temple of Hawai‘i between midnight and 3:30 a.m. to receive a blessing from a Shinto priest. You can buy a lucky amulet and a paper fortune to bring you good luck in 2018. Expect 6,000 people there. If you want to arrive earlier to beat the crowd, there will be a blessing on Dec. 31 at 10 and 11 p.m. Parking is available in the shrine’s parking lot and at the Boy Scouts parking lot across the street. Free, midnight to 4 p.m., The Daijingu Temple of Hawai‘i, 61 Pū‘iwa Road, daijingutemple.org Fukubukuro SUNDAY, DEC. 31, 2017–MONDAY, JAN. 1, 2018 (INTERNATIONAL MARKET PLACE) MONDAY, JAN. 1, 2018 (ALA MOANA CENTER) Fukubukuro is a Japanese New Year’s Day custom in which retailers fill bags with mystery items and sell the bags at a discounted rate. At Ala Moana Center and International Market Place, you can take part in the tradition. For example, a mystery bag selling for $50 will contain at least $100 worth of merchandise. Here’s how it works: You can visit the participating stores, including Kate Spade New York, Godiva, Eden in Love and Reyn Spooner, to pick up a mystery bag. Sorry, you can’t open the bag until after you buy it. What’s inside? It’s a surprise! Expect limited quantities and long lines, so plan to hit up your favorite stores early. Price varies, 9:30 a.m.–9 p.m., Jan. 1, 2018, Ala Moana Center, alamoanacenter.com/en.html Price varies, 10 a.m.–10 p.m., Dec. 31, 2017 and Jan. 1, 2018, International Market Place, shopinternationalmarketplace.com/holidays New Year’s ‘Ohana Festival SATURDAY, JAN. 14, 2018 Celebrate the Year of the Dog at the Japanese Cultural Center of Hawai‘i’s ‘Ohana Festival. This is a kickoff event to celebrate the 150th anniversary of gannen mono, the first Japanese immigrants to settle in Hawai‘i. There’ll be a craft fair, keiki games, food booths and more. Pro tip: Park your car for free at the University of Hawai‘i’s parking structure, then catch a complimentary shuttle to the festival. Free, 10 a.m.–4 p.m., Mō‘ili‘ili Field, jcch.com/events/2018-new-years-‘ohana-festival LIST: New Year's Eve events across Hawaii to ring in 2018 K5/HNN Oahu Fireworks Displays Aloha Tower Marketplace Display times 9 p.m., 10 p.m., 11 p.m. and midnight. Barge fronting Kahala Avenue 10:30 p.m. Hilton Hawaiian Village Waikiki Beach Resort Lagoon 11 p.m. Offshore barge, Waikiki 12 midnight The Kahala Hotel & Resort 12 midnight Four Seasons Resort Oahu at Ko Olina, Coves 1 and 2 12 midnight Turtle Bay Resort 11:59 p.m. Oahu New Year's Eve Events Mililani Town Center Pineapple Drop After a two-year hiatus, the beloved Pineapple Drop welcomes the new year with the lowering of a giant illuminated pineapple. The man-made pineapple stands at 12 feet tall and six feet wide, and lights up with more than 2,500 bulbs. The parking lot between Consolidated Theatres and Chilis opens to attendees at noon with entertainment, lion dances and activities to follow. The pineapple will be lowered at 7 p.m. to coincide with the New York City NYE Ball Drop. 8th Annual Party of the Year This two-day event begins on Saturday Dec. 30. Headline group The Chainsmokers will perform at Aloha Stadium on Saturday. All ages welcome. Then revelers will return Sunday to celebrate the start of 2018. The best 2017 New Year's Eve parties and events in Hawaii - Hawaii Magazine OAHU New Year’s Eve 2018 at Buho Cocina y Cantina Who needs a New Year’s Eve bash when you can have a fiesta? Set in the heart of Waikiki, this chic Mexican restaurant opens its rooftop bar as 2018 makes its arrival. Honolulu-based DJ Toma will be providing the night’s soundtrack, while you enjoy margaritas and authentic Mexican cuisine. 21+, starts at 10 p.m., $50 general admission tickets, 2250 Kalakaua Ave., fifth floor, Waikiki, buhocantina.com. New Year’s Eve Celebration: The Seven Kingdoms at RumFire Party oceanfront around the Sheraton Waikiki’s pools with a perfect view of the midnight fireworks. Couple this with a constant mix of DJs, live entertainment and the famous RumFire bar for an unforgettable night. 21+, 8:30 p.m. to 2:30 a.m., $120 general admission tickets, VIP packages and separate Champagne Room bookings available, 2255 Kalakaua Ave., Waikiki, rumfirewaikiki.com. New Year’s Eve 2018 Masquerade Party at Sky Waikiki You’ll find the best view of Waikiki at Sky Waikiki’s rooftop lounge. An upscale dress code is strictly enforced at this New Year’s gala (men must wear collared shirts, pants and dress shoes), and masquerade masks are highly recommended. Food and drinks will be on sale all night long, with the hosted bar featuring Ketel One Vodka and Veuve Clicquot Champagne. 21+, 8 p.m. to midnight, $200 general admission tickets, 2270 Kalakaua Ave., 19th Floor, Waikiki, skywaikiki.com. Star of Honolulu’s New Year’s Eve Midnight Cruise If you’re looking for a different way to ring in the New Year, consider boarding the Star of Honolulu at the Aloha Tower Marketplace. While sailing beyond Diamond Head and down the Kahala Coastline, enjoy a three-course dinner, a view of the Waikiki fireworks and onboard entertainment. All ages, 10:15 p.m. to 12:30 a.m., $195 general admission tickets, 1 Aloha Tower Dr., Honolulu, starofhonolulu.com. 8th Annual Party of the Year Party with the masses at Aloha Tower Marketplace with 30 bands and DJs, featuring Walshy Fire of Major Lazer. There will also be food trucks and the island’s largest fireworks show. Choose the Sunday-only pass at $45 for general admission, or get a two-day pass ($135 early general admission) and attend The Chainsmokers concert the night before on Dec. 30, too. For more information, visit tickets.nyehawaii.com. Where to party on New Year’s Eve - Frolic Hawaii 8th Annual Bud Light New Year’s Eve Party of the Year 7 p.m. Aloha Tower Marketplace, 1 Aloha Tower Drive $45-150 Tickets More than 30 bands, musicians and local entertainers are performing on seven stages and venues throughout Aloha Tower Marketplace. There’ll be lots of libations, as well as food from Eat the Street food trucks. The night’s capped off with a stellar fireworks display above historic Aloha Tower. New Year’s Eve 2017 Great Lawn Gala 7 p.m. Hilton Hawaiian Village, 2005 Kalia Rd. $300 Tickets Hilton Hawaiian Village’s New Year’s Eve celebration features performances by Hoku Hanohano Award-winning Henry Kapono and Dukes of Surf. You can also enjoy a four-course set dinner—sashimi salad, Pacific crab and kabocha pumpkin bisque, petite filet mignon and butter-poached Maine lobster, and chocolate tasting trio—and a fireworks finale to top off the evening. Tiki Drop 2018 Waikiki New Year’s Eve Party 7 p.m. Tiki’s Grill & Bar, 2570 Kalakaua Ave. $79 plus tax and tip Tickets The annual Tiki Drop Party overlooks Waikiki Beach, with two live bands, a DJ, dancing and great views of the fireworks. The full dinner menu is available along with a special prix fixe menu featuring a filet mignon and petite Tristan lobster tail duet. Oceanfront Dining VIP and Oceanfront Lanai VIP party packages are also available if you want to bring the whole gang. New Year's Eve Pineapple Drop 2 to 7 p.m. Town Center of Mililani, 95-1249 Meheula Pkwy. Free Live entertainment starts on the Kanikapila Stage at 2, Mike Love and Maunalua headline from 5:15, and a countdown synced to the New Year's Eve ball drop in New York's Times Square begins at 6:59. At 7 p.m. Mililani's famous lighted pineapple drops, leaving plenty of time to go find another NYE party somewhere. Free Pineapple Drop lightup fidget spinners with $25 purchase. Bill Maher’s 7th Annual New Year’s Evening of Comedy 7:30 p.m. Blaisdell Concert Hall, 777 Ward Ave. Tickets from $45.50 Tickets For the seventh year in a row, Bill Maher will be ringing in the New Year on Oahu. This evening of comedy will be extra special this year because Maher will be performing alongside actor and Grammy-nominated standup comedian Bob Saget (Full House) and comedic impersonator Reggie Brown as Barack Obama. SKY Waikiki – New Year’s Eve Masquerade Party 8 p.m. SKY Waikiki, 2270 Kalakaua Ave. $150-300 Tickets Masks are highly recommended for this annual event. Tickets include hosted food offerings—including duck pot stickers, jalapeno poppers, crab dip crostini and more—a hosted bar and entertainment by guest DJ William Lifestyle. VIP reservations are also available and include exclusive dining offerings with hosted bottle service. Under the Sea 8 p.m. Moana Surfrider, A Westin Resort & Spa, 2365 Kalakaua Ave. $125 Tickets Ring in 2018 with a splash with the Moana’s “sea-tacular” New Year’s Eve party. The evening features Polynesian dancers and fire knife shows, live music by Taimane and Manoa DNA, fun kids’ activities, an oceanfront fireworks show and more. VIP cabanas and tables are available for an elevated NYE experience. The Seven Kingdoms 8:30 p.m. Sheraton Waikiki, 2255 Kalakaua Ave. $120 Tickets Revel in the night at Sheraton Waikiki’s “Seven Kingdoms” NYE extravaganza. Dress to impress and enjoy amazing oceanfront views of the midnight fireworks. Complimentary validated parking is good for up to four hours. Hideout NYE 9 p.m. Hideout at The Laylow, 2299 Kuhio Ave. $50 Tickets Embrace 2018 at the Hideout’s New Year’s Eve masquerade. This party’s taking place at the pool deck, since the two DJs and two bars will be too much for the open-air lanai and firepits to handle. Tickets include complimentary masks, tasty appetizers and a champagne toast, so all you need to bring is your best white attire. Monte Carlo Casino Night 9 p.m. 53 By The Sea, 53 Ahui St. $150 Tickets You can bet on a great night at this black-tie event. Enjoy gourmet hors d’oeuvres, live music, a martini bar, cigar lounge, dancing, raffle prizes and more. Play your hand at the High Rollers table and ring in 2018 in style. Hawaiian Brian’s Crossroads Soulgasm 9 p.m. Hawaiian Brian’s Crossroads, 1680 Kapiolani Blvd. (concert room to the left) $10 Tickets Celebrate the new year with a House, Funk and Soul party! This party features award-winning musician, producer and DJ Cevil of thePeople’s party. There'll be goodies and giveaways from 9 to 10 p.m., so go early. There’s no better way to ring in 2018 than with some feel-good vibes. Kahala Masquerade Ball 2018 9 p.m. The Kahala (Maile Ballroom, poolside under the stars), 5000 Kahala Ave. $250 Tickets Sip on champagne and ring in 2018 in style at The Kahala. The evening kicks off with buffet-style food stations in the Maile Foyer from 9 to 11 p.m., with bar service and a nightclub and dancing area. Then, continue the party poolside with live music, a photo booth and midnight fireworks. Event tickets include complimentary tiaras, beads and festive hats at check-in, and noisemakers will be distributed at 11:30 p.m. Complimentary parking is included. Addiction’s Winter Ball 2018 9 p.m. The Modern, 1775 Ala Moana Blvd. $40 (pre-sale), $60 (general admission) Tickets Count down to 2018 with DJs and dancing. Enjoy a VIP champagne reception at 9 p.m.; presale tickets are available until Dec. 29. To book your table reservation or for more information, visit [email protected]. Buho Cantina 10 p.m. Buho Cocina y Cantina, 2250 Kalakaua Ave. $50 Tickets Celebrate under the stars at Buho Cantina’s rooftop venue. Ring in the New Year with DJ Toma and an epic annual bash! Dress to impress; for VIP reservations, contact [email protected]. Dave & Buster’s New Years Eve Family Fun 5 p.m. Dave & Buster’s Honolulu, 1030 Auahi St. $39.96 or $46.26 Tickets Enjoy food and fun with the whole family to ring in the New Year! Designed for families, this event is from 5 to 8 p.m. and attendees can choose between two food-and-games package options. They include an appetizer buffet, dessert, unlimited soft drinks, Power Cards, a video ball drop to ring in 2018 and more. AAA Hawaii Offers Tipsy Tow Service For New Year’s Eve To help remove drinking drivers from the road, AAA Hawaii is offering its Tipsy Tow service during New Year’s Eve. The service is available from 6 p.m. Sunday, Dec. 31, until 6 a.m. Monday, Jan. 1. Tipsy Tow is available in the areas served by AAA Hawaii. AAA Hawaii encourages party-goers to plan ahead for a sober ride or use a designated driver if attending a gathering. But if those plans fall through, motorists, bartenders, restaurant managers, party hosts or passengers of a drinking driver may call 1-800-222-4357 for a free tow home of up to five miles. Callers simply tell the AAA operators, “I need a Tipsy Tow,” to receive the free tow and ride home. A regular AAA Hawaii-contracted roadside assistance service truck will be dispatched. Tipsy Tow is unique in that it provides a driver with the option of a safe ride home for themselves and their vehicle instead of driving while intoxicated. Callers need to keep in mind that the service excludes rides for passengers, is restricted to a one-way, one-time ride for the driver and the destination is limited to the driver’s residence. Reservations are not accepted. Drivers can expect to pay the rate charged by the tow truck contractor for rides beyond five miles. “We want motorists to be aware of the high crash risk from drinking and driving associated with the holiday and encourage them to think twice about getting behind the wheel if they have been drinking,” said AAA Hawaii’s General Manager Liane Sumida. According to Hawaii state data, impaired driving continues to present a significant problem in Hawaii and poses a danger to public safety. Of the state’s 95 traffic fatalities in 2014, 52 (55 percent) had alcohol and/or drugs in their system. Nationwide, in 2016, crashes claimed 37,461 lives, and 28 percent died in crashes involving drunk drivers. An average of one alcohol-impaired driving fatality occurred every 51 minutes, according to the National Highway Transportation Safety Administration (NHTSA). New Year’s Eve traditionally is a time for home parties, as well as outings to restaurants and bars, and other excursions and gatherings. These activities contribute to a relaxed atmosphere and more drinking, according to Sumida. “It takes only one or two drinks to slow physical and mental skills and affect vision, steering, braking, judgment and reaction time,” Sumida said. “Drivers should be aware that the law enforcement agencies are using extra patrols to look for drinking drivers during the holiday.” Drinking drivers frequently don’t plan for other ways to get home because they are concerned about retrieving their vehicle. They cite the expense of taxis and time inconvenience as the major reasons they don’t use alternative transportation, according to AAA Hawaii. Today, more options are available including designated sober drivers, public transit and ride-hailing services. People convicted of driving under the influence could lose many of the most important things in their lives, such as family, job, dignity and money. AAA Hawaii estimates that a first time DUI conviction can cost approximately $15,688 or more in fines, penalties, restitution, legal fees and insurance costs. AAA Hawaii advises those who celebrate New Year’s Eve to keep themselves and others safe and avoid DUI arrests by following these safety tips:
Always plan ahead to designate a non-drinking driver before any party or celebration begins.
At social events, designate non-drinking drivers who can get everyone home safely.
Never serve alcohol to those under age 21. It’s illegal and dangerous.
Never ride as a passenger in a car driven by someone who was drinking alcohol – even after one drink.
Call a friend or family member for a ride home if you’ve been drinking.
Keep a cab company or sober ride telephone number in your cell phone and wallet so you can call for a ride home.
As a party host, offer non-alcoholic drink alternatives and provide a gift to guests who volunteer to be designated drivers; provide overnight accommodations to guests who’ve been drinking.
Take the car keys away from friends and relatives who have been drinking.
If you encounter an impaired driver on the road, keep a safe distance and ask a passenger to call 9-1-1 (or pull over to a safe location to make the call yourself).
Remember: prescription, over-the-counter medications and illegal drugs also can impair your ability to drive safely.
Although Tipsy Tow is offered by AAA Hawaii and other AAA clubs, it is not a nationwide program. Check with your local AAA club for availability. Visit PreventDUI.AAA.com for impaired driving facts, transportation alternatives and expert advice. AAA encourages visitors to Take the Pledge to drive drug and alcohol-free.
So, you wanna go to SHOT show? You think it's all fun and games? Get to play with guns? See Jesse James and R. Lee Ermey? SHOT show is the annual pilgrimage of the unwashed masses to Las Vegas to rub elbows with youtube celebrities, bloggers and overseas businessmen copying US made equipment and share infectious disease. If you love guns, gambling and gonorrhea - SHOT show is for you! It is not my typical idea of a good time. I am not a big fan of Las Vegas. However: I do attend for a few reasons. First, I do enjoy travel and I'm platinum on AA so I can usually score an upgrade. Second, industry people are in there that I do hundreds of thousands if not millions of dollars with business with so it's nice to put a face with the name and see what deals are out there. SHOT for me has been a bust for the past few years. Being a value guy, I want to buy at $1000 and sell at $3000 and as of recently the gun business is more like buy for $1 and sell for $1.10 if you get what I mean. We used to do business at SHOT and now it's just checking in on foursquare, instagram and rubbing elbows with bloggers and the like. I want to make money, not spend money so this is very annoying to me. Anyways, onto the play by play. Monday, January 22nd. One day before SHOT show. The TSA line is a shitshow thanks to, well TSA. I have pre check and breeze right through. I slog my way to the lounge, as shitty as it is to wait for my winged chariot to DFW. I have gone from being in an abusive relationship with Delta to being in an abusive relationship with AA. Although if you really want to experience the battered spouse feeling, UA is a few gates over. I board my flight to Dallas/FW and my Renton assembled chariot is having a problem with one of the ring laser gyros, the hate agent tells us we are delayed for an indeterminate amount of time. Even as an AA Plat, I have no cleared upgrades. I am number 4 on the list with one seat open to Dallas/FW. I am 39/61 for Dallas/FW to LAX. Fuck my life. I gate check my bags to make life easier for me and the rest of the folks slumming it. If I don't have to worry about being short on time, I like to gate check to free up bins for those who are not as fortunate. Eventually I board and ask the FA to say hi to the captain and get a ride report. Light chop all over north texas today and we're going to take the long way around the field due to wind. Me: I guess it's true. Dallas always does seem to blow a little harder in the postseason... CA: Hahhahaha FO: You got that right! Go eagles! Having brightened the day of the flight crew, I head back to my MCE seat in Y and kick back and relax by listening to my Rumours, my favorite fleetwood mac album on my ipod. We land at Dallas an hour and a half late eating into my 4 hour spa layover I had planned. I hightail it to the Centurion lounge in terminal D, my home away from home. Thankfully I don't need a massage since I brought my friend Laura some homemade chocolate rice crispy squares and she gave me a one hour massage and gave me a happy ending. I grab a plate and help myself to some of the excellent chicken and some mashed red potatoes and bacon It is cheesy and DELICIOUS. Between that and the poblano rice, I can feel it going straight to my thighs. No, I do not care. NOM NOM NOM https://imgur.com/a/WBcyd The lounge is packed. The bar is full and I grab a quick single malt as I have my meal since American's not going to feed me. They begin boarding to LAX as I walk out of the lounge. I make it to the gate and the entire plane has boarded because the screens say they are boarding group 9. Giving the FA a friendly nod, I ask to say hi to the captain and I stride through J and say hello to the two gentlemen flying today. Aviation nerd protip: CHECK YOUR ROUTING! I didn't, but I had a hunch since arriving from the east we'd get the ANJLL 1 or the HLYWD 1 arrival. I got a 50/50 shot. Let's see how good I am. Drop my bags at the threshold, poke my head in. Me: Howdy guys, we still looking good for the Hollywood 1 tonight? CA: Man, you did your homework yes we are! GABBL transition as a matter of fact! Damn I'm good. FC: Nice! I know you guys take a rash of crap from drunk Parker so I like to say hello to the folks who do the heavy lifting and I'm a total airplane dork so it's cool to check the place out. CA: I'm an airplane dork too! I'm Jeff Rowland, nice to meet ya! SUPER nice guy. He gave me a tour of the airplane, even took a picture of me in the left seat. https://imgur.com/a/xVIy6 Here he is showing me some stuff around the airplane. He gives me the grand tour of the 787-9 including this neat feature that actually measures how many G's they have on landing so they know whether or not they need an overweight landing inspection or not. AMAZING airplane. I'm shown all the bells and whistles and they tell me how fun the plane is to fly. Jeff takes a few pics of me in the best seat of the house. I tell the guys I'll see them at the in and out burger on Sepuldeva and I hike back to my seat in W. The FA's were wondering where I was, and they gave away my assigned seat. I take an empty center aisle seat and make life easier for everyone. W in the 787-9 is a solid hard product. The BE Aerospace MI-Q seat is a good ride whether in it for 3 hours to LAX or 13 to CDG like I was in a few months ago. https://imgur.com/a/iPHVh The boarding door closes for an on time departure and I watch another airplane movie - American Made with Tom Cruise. He's so dreamy. Jeff's PA's were really lame and had a whole bunch of people laughing in the back on the way to LA. The flight was not long enough. The landing is a perfect grease job on 24L and we await a tug to get towed into gate 41 at LAX. I say thanks again to the flight crew - worthy of note, http://andystravelblog.boardingarea.com/2018/01/29/pilots-lette My next hop via a 737 to LAS is uneventful. I stop at the Centurion lounge for some freshly squeezed OJ. It is DELICIOUS as AA's app tells me my bags are being unloaded. I grab my things and hop in the last car Hertz has in the gold section - a 2016 Toyota Corolla. Times are rough. I'm at Circus Circus again. I check in and tell the lady about the last time I was there with the neighbors and the extremely loud sex. Full story: tail end of this - https://www.reddit.com/guns/comments/5podeq/shot_2017my_tales_of_adventure_in_las_vegas/ She damn near busts a gut laughing and upgrades me to a skyrise room and gives me a line pass and complimentary buffet. I arrive to my room where housekeeping has not cleaned it to my exacting specifications. Specifically, there are like three hairballs from a cat in the chair next to the desk. I ask for another room and they set it up for me. It's now 1AM. In and out burger is closed. Fuck. Tuesday, January 23rd SHOT Show Day One You gotta get into the palazzo garage before 8AM or you are not getting a spot. I get in at 8:01 and miraculously find a spot. They are doing so much construction at the resort that I don't recognize it. I grab my pass and check in with some other industry associates. My first day is semi-eventful as I check out the sig 365, a very promising concealed carry product as well as a few other really neat things and many many useless items. I run into u/chugbleach in the basement and we trade stories. He shows me some neat stuff he's been working on. We plan to dine later in the week and I continue walking the show when I see the most amazing booth ever. Backstory: https://www.reddit.com/guns/comments/7ag6oj/gsg_stg_44/dp9u9hw/ I let fluff buy the hook, he posts $120 to win $100 if he gets his HMG gun by the end of Q1. If gun arrives on time, he gets $100 from me. If no, I get $120 from him. I walk back to chug. FC: DUDE DUDE DUDE YOU GOTTA SEE THIS COME QUICK CB: Okay lets go We walk briskly not 100 feet. I stop quickly. Chug looks confused. I gesticulate wildly to our right. This is what we see. I crack up laughing and can barely contain myself. This is the greatest thing I have seen in weeks. On that note it is time to take a break for lunch. I head up to one of my vendors who has a hospitality suite for the show and they are serving jambalaya for lunch every day. As a Louisiana boy, we do love jambalaya. There's a reason I spend lots of money with them. I eat and have a coke as I trade gun jokes with other gun dealers. I wander around the show and nothing else jumps at me. I walk the footbridge over to the Wynn to see how the house is doing. The poker room is full. I draw $2500 from my credit line and head down to the craps table to throw some dice. I have some mixed success as it's getting late and I want to hit the in and out burger so as I'm getting ready to leave, Laura sends me a bunch of filthy text messages about what she wants to do to me when I get back. My chips and raging boner leave the tables quickly as I duck into the bathroom to tell her that if she wants to treat me like a prisoner on a conjugal visit - I went to 8 years of catholic school, she's entering a world of pain. She says game on. After a quick trip to the cage to cash out, I'm up or down something like $100. I swing by in and out burger for a double double. It is delicious. Sleepy time. Wednesday, January 24th. Day 2 of SHOT show. Alarm goes off at 7:45 AM. I wash up, eat and get breakfast. In the garage by 8:15. Still manage to find a spot! Attendance is down this year. I get in line at Larue. They run out of dillo dust at 8:39. This is the line at 8:35 https://imgur.com/a/KLHrg The show opens at 8:30. Fuck my life. I grab a dillo and some stickers for some friends and a few HK calendars. I wander around and talk to the guys over at Franklin Armory and their new SBR that isn't an SBR, SBS that isn't an SBS and rifle that isn't really a rifle BUT IS STILL A FIREARM. The projectiles they want to sell have fin stabilization and it's like a 55 grain flying Lombardi trophy. It's an interesting idea but I'm not 100% certain I would buy one personally. I trade war stories with a few other friends I meet up with at the show. I head down to the basement and I'm looking at a few accessories from Tactical Walls. Just as I'm ready to leave - Joe Mantegna shows up and says hi to the reps. FC: Mr Mantegna! I love your work! Can I get a picture? JM: Sure. Someone grabs my phone and snaps a pic FC: You are great in the simpsons as Fat Tony. Just the best! JM: (in fat tony voice) I don't get mad. I get stabby. FC: That's awesome! Thanks! Enjoy the show! I send the pics to some friends who enjoy snappy Mamet plays and they are all jealous. I head down to the basement. The ATF booth is vacant due to the government shutdown. So is the FBI booth. Oh well. I head upstairs to the manufacturer supplier section and I find out that Olympic Arms is still in business making things. I do a lap and get some business cards from some precision machine companies that can make some elaborate parts. Jambalaya again for lunch. Nom nom nom. I head down to FN to talk shop with the guys down there and give them shit. FN's new innovation is a two tone FDE/Black gun. So now 50% of the gun does not have to match. I trade barbs with Mike Hoffman and we debate the age old question, is it really gay if you can suck your own cock? Just as I mention this, Steve Bannon shows up at the booth. That's my stop. I say hello to the director of commercial sales on my way out and go to the Knights booth where I find they're making 6.5 Creed stuff now. Interesting how quickly that cartridge has caught on. I talk shop with a few of the KAC guys and then I steal some more HK Kalendars for friends back home. I hit the Circus Circus buffet with my free pass for the unpleasantness and it is not that great at all. They ran out of roast beef. I mean, really? SHOT SHOW IS IN TOWN! We are beef eating gun owners, and you're gonna run out of roast beef? This would never happen at the Wynn, an amazing property. I make a mental note to sell my MGM Mirage stock and buy some Wynn in the morning. I head back to the craps table and lose a shitload of money. I witness a heater happen after I color up and watch people go nuts. My luck at MGM properties has not been good. Ugh. I don't feel like doing gunnit live and head to sleep early. Thursday, January 25th. Day 3 of SHOT show. I message Chug and let him know that it's gotta be tonight if we're gonna hang since I fly out Friday night for Boston. We plan to make plans for dinner. I head to the show and get there at 3 minutes to 8. One of my best customers calls me wanting an XM2010. I head over to Remington and through some finagling they manage to say YES WE CAN SELL IT EVEN THOUGH WE ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO SELL IT. I work up a quote and get the customer the info and tell him what's what. I visit the nighthawk custom booth where they have a new gun chambered in .45 APC. https://imgur.com/a/9bNe7 I kid with a few FBI guys about their attention to detail. I saunter about the show. Leatherman Tool Group always has some nice things to play with. Tim Leatherman is engraving tools for people with his autograph. I'm happy with all of his products I own and I stop by to shake his hand and tell him that my wave has saved my ass on a hundred different occasions and I once resurrected a Ford off the side of the road. He says he loves hearing the stories and he's a pretty nice guy. I wander about a little more and I find myself over at the Emerson Knife Company booth looking around. For those not in the know, Emerson has a bunch of specwar types as customers. Damn good knives and operator customers. One of them is behind the table wearing a badge that says JOHN SMITH - JOHN SMITH INC. He's got arms that are as thick as my legs and he looks like a Navy Seal. He bolts upright from his seat and looks at my wrist. "Is that a 1675?" FC: Sure is! Damn good eye! My dad won it in an underground poker game in Hong Kong in 1968 from a couple of navy guys on shore leave that flew F4's off Dixie Station. "Holy crap, that's fucking awesome!" We talk watches and guns and killing people for a while. He says he's in the navy and the budweiser insignia necklace he is wearing tells me everything I need to know. Nice guy. I wonder what his real name is as the show closes down and as I walk out the magpul booth gives me a laugh. A paper sign on the door says "DOOR IS LOUD AF CLOSE GENTLY" I'm not kidding - https://imgur.com/a/GgSkU I head over to Chug's hotel and he gives me the grand tour. It's way nicer than my hotel. We go out and have dinner. I'm asked if I like Thai. FC: Tie good, you like shirt? Nobody gets my simpsons jokes. We go to dinner where a good time is had by all. Chug gets a call and needs to drop off a SHOT show pass to a co-worker of his flying in. As opposed to all the mechanics of a dead drop at the palazzo etc I tell him fuck it, just give it to me and I'll pick him up from the airport. In exchange, I tell him I want all the leftover chicken wings from the Thai place. It's a deal. I grab the wings and head to McCarran. There's a guy in a BRZ hauling ass and I decide to see what this shitbox can do. I get the Corolla up to 115 MPH on the highway before backing down to a more sensible speed. After 5 minutes of MARCO / POLO I find the fellow and give him his shot show pass and a ride to his hotel. I find it funny that last year I ran an unapproved uber substitute and here we are again and the same thing is happening. I'm offered gas money or a beer after the show and I tell him hey, it's your first time at SHOT - enjoy the show, don't sweat it. I hightail it up the strip to the Palazzo where I play a bit and eventually see a heater in progress. I split the 6/8 for $120 each and they hit. I press it and they hit again. Maybe this won't be a bad trip after all. Table craps out and I cash out still down a few bucks but better than when I started. By the time I make it back to the room, it's 4AM. I eat the chicken wings. They're delicious. Friday, January 26th. Day 4 of SHOT show. I've gotten most of what I want to get done, done. I ordered some Firearm Instructor body armor from one of my guys since lots of people want me dead first thing in the AM and things were going good. I sleep in and debate what I want for breakfast when I realize things are going a little too good. Nothing really bad has happened this trip yet. I pack up and get ready to leave the hotel when I get a push notification. MOTHERFUCKER My flight to Boston has been canceled. My confirmed first class seats on one of the hardest to upgrade legs in the entire AA route network - LAX to BOS, gone. AA proactively books me on the flight leaving LA a few hours later IN COACH. A middle seat, even. No, just no. I call American and they tell me the plane is broken. Damnit. I look on the app for acceptable reroutings and there is nothing available in first. I say fuck it, I'll deal with this shit later. I have the rental car until midnight, lots of time to make a new plan. I check out of the hotel, throw my bags in the car and head down to the show and it's a freaking ghost town. Parking spaces everywhere. I say bye to a few folks as my phone sends me a notification. WSJ: STEVE WYNN ACCUSED OF DECADES OF SEXUAL MISCONDUCT Oh FUCK MY LIFE. I bought the stock back on Wednesday. GODDAMNIT STEVE WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS BULLSHIT I skip lunch and walk across the street to the Wynn and their corporate office. You see, I have a simple theory. If the allegations are false, they should have no problem sending someone out to listen to my concerns and say the allegations are false and here's everything we're doing to fight it. If the allegations are true, they'll send down hired goons to throw me out the door. It's sorta like spousal infidelity. If A finds evidence of B cheating, credit card statements, sexts, racy pictures, etc - and A confronts B and B admits it and says I want a divorce, B is guilty. If B says A is cheating on them what the fuck are you doing looking at my credit card statements and phone you're the one that's wrong and invading my privacy get the fuck out of my house - B is really guilty. That's the theory. If they go full retard and bounce me off the property, the stock is probably going to go down some more. If they address the concerns, things should not be as bad. Since I walked through the property the last time I was in town, I knew where the corporate office was. The name on my broker statement says WYNN RESPORTS and so did the sign on the doors. I walk through the doors and to the end of the hallway where there's another electronically locked door that is unlocked. There's a security guard who is nonplussed sitting at a desk wondering if I'm lost. I explain to him that I'm a shareholder and I want to know what this company is doing about this catastrophe. He says he can't say/do anything and I'm instructed to leave. I ask him if he can take a message. He says yes, and I'm like you just said you can't do anything. So what's that supposed to mean? I argue with him about what he supposedly can and cannot do as I eat raspberry macrons that have been plated at the reception area of the corporate office. THESE BETTER BE THE BEST FUCKING MACARONS I HAVE EVER EATEN GODDAMNIT. They are. Fuck. He tells me that my best bet is to talk to someone else at the resort, not him. Fine. I leave and head to the concierge desk - because from one concierge to another, we can solve problems. I explain the situation and instead of routing me to the press office or investor relations - they give me a phone and tell me to speak to guest services. AKA the people that help you with your stay as a guest of the hotel. I give the lady taking the message about 15 minutes worth of comments and she's assured me that they'll be passed along to management. Given the circumstances I think that's the best I'm going to do today. Now, there's the issue of me being stuck in vegas for another night. I look down at my phone and AA has offered three itineraries flying out of McCarran tomorrow IN FIRST CLASS that gets me to Boston in a timely fashion. I jump on the 625AM flight to Charlotte. This means I need to be at the car rental by 525AM and out the door around 0430. Fuck my life. And I have nowhere to sleep/showeshit/shave. As I'm walking back to the esplanade to cross back over to the Palazzo where my car is, I notice the registration desk. I get in line and a lovely lady asks what she can do for me. I tell her that I'm a shareholder and I'm pretty mad about the way the company is handling their sex offender in chief. And given the $18 haircut I took on the stock today, if there's an angry shareholder discount on a room tonight I think that would be more than fair given the circumstances. She agrees and gets me a bottle of water and the manager. The manager asks me if I've stayed at the hotel before, the answer is yes and asks to see my ID so she can see if she can plug me in at a repeat guest rate. A few minutes go by and I wait patiently at the desk when I'm tapped on the shoulder. There's two former NFL linebackers, one with his back towards me and the other introducing himself as the director of security. Hmmm. Lets see. For those not in the know, there's only one exit in and out of the wynn registration desk. If there's two bodies on me, there's gotta be at least two more at each side of the wall behind it that I can't see, I figure 4 sets of eyes running the eye in the sky all with their eyes glued to the monitors, the director of security is holding my ID which means he's already got my play, my comps, my markers, run me through central credit, my red card, he's got metro running me for wants/warrants and there's probably an unmarked metro ford next to a service exit with an open door and a seat reserved for me in the back. I look down at my watch. The market is closed. I can't sell. Fuck. Because there is no way in hell this stock is holding $180 monday morning. Quickly, I bang out a message to my brother letting him know I am about to be arrested at the Wynn and to start googling Las Vegas bail bonds. The two security guys tell me to step away from the front desk and they want to know what the hell I'm doing. I tell them I want answers from the management of this company about how they're handling this disaster. They say I can't just walk into a casino corporate office and ask to speak to someone. Well, I just did. Why can't I? They said it represents a major security risk and a breach of their perimeter. After all, Mr. Wynn takes his security at the hotel very seriously. Me: I suppose if I were a sex offender with hired goons, I'd take my security seriously too. And if you really didn't want people going back there - last time I checked, this is a casino. The doors have locks. Perhaps you should have oh I don't know, locked them? Wynn Security: What makes you think you can just walk in here and talk to us like that? Me: I'm a stockholder. Technically you work for me. Wynn Security: You honestly expect that a big company like us is going to send someone out of the corporate office to talk to a guy like you about a thing like this? That never happens in corporate america. Me: That's strange. Michael Moore did exactly that and that's what made him famous. What's your point? We bantered in the registration area of the Wynn for something like an hour and 45 minutes as the director of security wandered back and forth. They never backed down with the questions and I never backed down from the answers. A lot of casino security is former law enforcement so they're looking for that time you change your story like on an episode of cops. For instance, if it was cops it would go like Cop: who's drugs are these? 1: Never seen em before fast forward 2 min 1: I mean my friend smokes pot, maybe it's his Cop: I thought you said you never seen em before? fast forward 2 min 1: So I smoke a little pot okay Cop: I thought you said it might be your friends pot? fast forward 2 min 1: yeah it's my pot They were looking for a reason to throw me out and as far as I can tell, they probably still are. I'm sorta expecting a registered letter in the mail barring me from the property in a week. If I start yelling, it's disorderly conduct and they have a case. If start pushing someone around, same thing. But if I speak candidly and gesticulate wildly and raise cogent points about how every single hotel employee I've dealt with thus far owns a combined total of zero shares in the company - they have no skin in the game and I do. So, they can't really criticize my opinion as wrong because I'm the stockholder not them. At least, that's my opinion. I could be wrong. Well, the goons disagreed with me and said I was wrong. They also said that this could have been accomplished with a phone call. I said no, because you wouldn't take a phone call seriously. And now you're taking this seriously. So, match point: FC. They didn't like that. It would not surprise me in the least if Steve Wynn was in the security booth with a radio telling his guys to find some reason to arrest me and have me sent to Clark County booking. This guy just feels guilty as sin. I can't prove it but my gut has usually been right about this sort of thing. As I'm waiting for my inevitable arrest and booking, I wonder if American Airlines will allow me another flight change due to temporary incarceration. Because there's no way I'll be able to leave the state with an ROR or a signature bond out. I look over at Mean Joe Greene Jr and tell him I was too angry to eat lunch and I'd like to have a seat before my blood sugar crashes and my head hits the floor and Steve sends me a bill for the shattered italian marble. He gestures towards a chair in the reception area and I have a sit. He offers to bring me another water. I decline. He brings me a water anyways. I consume both the waters as compliments of the house as a sign of untoward cooperation. Out of the corner of my eye I see the director of security talking to two metro PD guys with handcuffs out. I hear over the radio they're asking for a rover to take me down to the security office for fingerprinting and photographs. He is gesticulating wildly. The director of security comes back over and he tries to get me to crack on my story. I tell him I'm here as a shareholder as a private citizen demanding accountability of the management. I will not apologize for walking through an unlocked door to the corporate office asking to speak to someone to hear out my concerns, I will not apologize for going to the concierge since the previous person was very unhelpful and I will not apologize for expecting the highest standards of a fortune 1000 company chairman and CEO. And until you pony up and buy some stock, I'm not about to take a lecture about what is and isn't acceptable behavior from people who don't have skin in the game protecting what should be by all accounts a registered sex offender. He looks back at Metro PD. They shrug. They've got nothing chargeable on me. Hell, I'm not even counting cards this time. Next thing I know he quickly walks away and returns with a late 20's hispanic fellow who introduces himself as the hotel manager. He says that he's gotten a report from security and that Mr. Wynn's private life he cannot comment on but the concerns I have will be sent up towards management. FC: So you're the hotel manager? So you report to Matt Maddox. You tell him that this is a mess. Nobody comes back from this sort of thing. Not Harvey Weinstein. Not Louis CK. Not Matt Lauer. Not Bill O'Reilly. Not Bill Cosby. Not Kevin Spacey. Not Charlie Rose. Not Al Franken. And the LAST time this happened at Mirage, a shareholder revolt wound up sending the company into the hands of MGM. What's to stop Sheldon from across the street from doing the same thing? You tell them that. The manager nods and offers me a room at a rate, inclusive of resort fee and taxes of $335/night. I take out my phone, look at the Hotel Tonight app and realize that I'm being charged more money than if I were to book the room from a consolidator. Now, I don't mind the lie about understanding where I'm coming from. I do mind the insult to my intelligence. I am handed back my ID and the hotel manager offers his business card. I take his business card and go over to the cage. I close my credit line and take my deposit out of the cage. I'm down for the trip. Fuck this shit, I'll deal with it later. I call my brother and tell him that I've been released. We look at some flights and to get back to Boston will require another night in Las Vegas. Everything leaving tonight is full due to the conventions closing up. AA has some seats open in first via Charlotte and Philly, I take the Charlotte flight leaving at 6:30 AM from McCarran and they confirm me seats in first all the way to Logan. This is the only thing to go right today. I purchase some clean clothes since I will not have time to do laundry in Boston anymore due to the delay and head over to the palace station oyster bar. The wait is about 2 hours but I make some friends in line while I'm there. I am torn between the alaskan chowder and the bouillabaisse. I ask Steve behind the bar what he thinks is best. He says do the bouillabaisse. I tell him that sounds excellent, and to add extra lobster. I ask him how long, he says could be 30 minutes but check back in 20. I tell him I'm gonna go hit the tables and I'll be back in 20. The timer on my phone begins counting down. I belly up to the nearest craps table and I drop my cash down. I tell them I want it in black and red and the croupier complies. I bet the 6/8 split with mixed success and the pass line with odds. The shooter misses the point. I look down at my dwindling stack of chips and there's 15 minutes left. Fuck it. Go big or go home. Lets get this shit over with. The point comes off. I drop $100 on the pass line. New shooter gets the dice and the come out roll hits a 10. I look at the gal with the whip. I throw her a stack of chips. FC: Full odds on the ten, $200 hard way, give me all the numbers and a nickel c and e. New shooter proceeds to hit every number on the board, midnight, yo and a speed limit. Pass line pays even money. Pass odds pays 2-1. I'm looking down at a big stack of chips. What the fuck just happened? I drop $100 on the pass line again, the point comes out for an 8. I take full odds and all the numbers. New shooter hits every number on the board, midnight, yo, except the 8. The guy next to me has the all or nothing at all working so the only thing left to hit is the 8 and it's gonna pay 175:1. The 8 does not hit. Everyone is chasing the 8'er from Decatur. I look down at my stack and the table limit and the boxman. FC: hey Joe, what's the juice on laying the 8? Joe: 5 points! I take down my pass line odds. FC: I want everything off and I'll lay the 8 for a dime. Everyone at the table looks at me like I'm a lunatic. I slide over two purple chips and two green for the vig. Time remaining until bouillabaisse: 8 minutes. Lets see what happens. The dice bang around a bunch of more times. I'm ahead for this trip. Way ahead. Next thing I know, the gal with the whip calls no roll. One of the dies have left the table. Time remaining until bouillabaisse: 4 minutes. This is my stop. FC: Take down my lay, and I'll color up. The boxman colors me up, I leave a nice tip for the crew and start to walk over to the cage to cash in. I hear screaming and profanity, I turn around and I see the dealers stacking chips. The shooter has 7'd out. Time remaining until bouillabaisse: 2 minutes. There's a long line at the cage. I walk back to the oyster bar and I see a big bowl with a plate covering it. Steve behind the bar has thought of everything. I turn the plate over and look down at my stack of chips. Maybe today won't be so bad after all. https://imgur.com/a/bjK7R The bouillabaisse is delicious. The win is even more delicious. I nom my way to the bottom of the bowl and settle up the bill. I leave Steve a nice tip as I head over to the Palazzo to say hi to some friends. I find myself at a craps table you can hang meat upon. This is not good. It's getting late and I head over to my room at the Mandalay Bay. Now, here's the fucked up part. This girl I've been hooking up with didn't hook up with me before I left for SHOT. She's been messing with my brain for a whole week. I check in to the Mandalay Bay where there's a goddamn pornstar convention going on. FML. I find myself down at a craps table at 11PM and bringing a frontier flight attendant named Amber back to my room. The lucky streak continues. My flight leaves in a few hours. I kick her out of my room and pass out. Flight leaves at 625 for CLT. Need to be at McCarran at 525. Out the door of the hotel by 5AM at the latest. I set my alarm. *Saturday, January 27th. * I wake up to see the sun shining through my hotel room. I look down at the alarm clock. 8:01AM. My long standing joke is that I sleep like a dead prostitute. The evening of ravenous illegal in 48 states sex has taken its toll. Fuck. I grab the phone and press the button for guest services. I turn on the speaker as I open my bag wide and just stuff everything in as fast as I can. I throw my boots on as I tell them to check me out over the phone. I haul ass downstairs to the garage and I get to McCarran and board the shuttle to Terminal 1. I walk up to the AA desk knowing I am 11 different kinds of fucked. Nancy the gate agent starts working on my departure. AA's rule is 2 hours from departure on a flat tire. That's 8:25 AM. It's a few minutes before 9. Nancy the great agent cannot get anything to work. She has to put me in the special services line. By the time I get there, they tell me I'm flying standby and I'm on the flight to Philly leaving at 1PM in the afternoon. There is no way in hell they can get me on the 10AM to Phoenix. My cousin is getting married in Boston and she is going to fucking kill me. I told her I'd be there around 6PM on the rebooking. And now I'm going to be leaving for Philly in 4 hours. Granted, the Amex Centurion Lounge has freshly squeezed OJ but that's not going to be enough today. I run to TSA and get cleared. I run past the Centurion to head straight for the Phoenix gate. Hopefully other folks have had an irish layover. The gate agent there starts working me and she says that they have two open seats and that they're gonna get me on. Just sit tight. I step to the side to let her help a few other folks gate check bags. The clock is ticking and her colleague closes the boarding door as I'm standing next to the gate looking fucked. I take a deep breath and try to keep it together. A tap on the shoulder. "Sir, your boarding pass. Exit row window. I've taken the liberty and called back to make sure there's space in the overhead for my bags so you don't have to gate check. You are good to go." I look up at the three ladies working the podium. FC: Can I hug any of you? Gate Agent 1: No Gate Agent 2: I'm sick Gate Agent 3: Sure, why not? I head behind the counter and give her a hug. She seems pleased. I hightail it to the door. Gate agent 2 opens it up for me. I run down the jetway like a charging rhino, Chris Christie like. The flight attendants greet me by name and they realize that my nose is bleeding from the 8 ball I shared with Amber a few hours back. The FA points at my nose and asks me if I'd like to step into the lav. I realize it's probably pretty bad. I leave my bags in the galley and duck in and I stuff a bunch of paper in my nose as an ersatz tampon. I walk back out, grab my bags and I declare to the entire plane it's the dry air not a cocaine problem. Nobody believes me. I take my seat and there's an empty seat between me and an in uniform FA on the way home. We chat a bit and Cathy thinks my story is hilarious. She even gets on AA's PALL list for the flight to Boston and checks and says I'm number one on standby R4. A nice lady, I offer her one of my extra LaRue Dillo's. She thinks they're cute. The working FA walks back and looks down at the traveling FA and says very discreetly there's a 40 minute ground hold due to PHX losing a runway. This is gonna be really really tight. My connecting flight to Boston is not looking good. We wait the 40 minutes for the hold and make it to PHX about 15 minutes behind schedule. I bolt to the Boston gate. I ask if they've cleared all the standby passengers. They say yes. I say I should be number one and they hand me a ticket in coach. FC: Any way I can talk you into a seat in the front of the plane? The hate agent just looks at me funny. He does not seem to think that's happening. He asks me if I have status on the airline. Sure do. He says no promises. I tell him no sweat, I'm gonna go take a leak and come back around in 5. I walk back up and he hands me my new boarding pass. https://imgur.com/a/IJuPe I call my cousin and tell her that I'm gonna be a few hours late. Great ride all the way into Boston. I sleep like a dead prostitute. https://imgur.com/a/RKMSu Just as we cruise past the city of big shoulders, the FA wakes me up. "Mr Hayden, would you like some ice cream?" I look at my neighbor who is a middle age female executive and she is plowing through hers like Sherman through Atlanta. FC: You know what, Chuck? I've always wanted to say this. I'll have what she's having. https://imgur.com/a/our5R Ice cream on the ground, delicious. Ice cream on a plane, FUCKING FANTASTIC. FC out.
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